Famewhores Articles

Famewhores, attention-seekers, opportunists, and spotlight chasers. Not all of them in poor taste. Cases in point: BB8 and Prince George.

Next week’s cover

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 14, 2009 11:58:00 July 14, 2009 11:58:00

Michael Jackson has been dominating magazine covers. And Jennifer Aniston wants a piece of the action. Every day the paps have been all over the set of Bounty starring Jen and Gerry Butler. She knows this. The entire crew knows this. So in between filming, just after eating – you can see a paper plate and a fork in his hand – Jen and Spittle decide to go for a stroll arm in arm giving the tabloids a story for next week: Jen and Gerry falling in love! Jen decided to make the photo even sweeter by recreating the exact same body position she once held with Brad Pitt in Anguilla on the day their divorce announcement was released. Full Story

They both needed it

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 13, 2009 15:06:58 July 13, 2009 15:06:58

As mentioned last week, Pipsqueak made the final three on the shortlist for the Green Lantern. The role, confirmed on Friday, eventually went to Ryan Reynolds. Several weeks ago, it was reported that his Shelf Ass Jessica Biel was a finalist for the love interest in the upcoming big budget Thor directed by Kenneth Branagh. Full Story

Granny Freeze: no love, no loyalty

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 10, 2009 07:47:11 July 10, 2009 07:47:11

Word is Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman has fired her publicist of 15 years. That’s a long, LONG time. The reason? Gran is blaming Catherine Olim for the current suckassness of her career. As you know, her box office has been dismal, and Australia was a massive, embarrassing, and expensive example of it and so Nicole is looking for a new rep, a new direction, like it’s everything to do with strategy and nothing to do with the fact that her face doesn’t move and she’s a fraud for f-cking with it? That may be what she’s telling herself but it’s certainly not an accurate assessment of her own image. Full Story

Back to real life

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 10, 2009 06:52:51 July 10, 2009 06:52:51

Because their real life is so grueling. Posh and Becks were celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary in the Seychelles but returned today, touching down at Heathrow looking coordinated and perfect, with their grim faces on for the paps like they’re sad to see them. Oh please. After picking up the kids in France somewhere David, I think?, is expected to return to LA for the Galaxy’s new season, just in good time for the release of The Beckham Experiment on July 14th, a new exposé on the superstar footballer’s move to America and the f-ckery behind the scenes. Full Story

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Jesus has Mercy with Madonna

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 6, 2009 09:27:00 July 6, 2009 09:27:00

It’s not the title of the next Bible lesson but you know she loves the allusion, right? Madonna resumed her Sticky & Sweet Tour in London at the O2 this weekend and has had her entire family in town for a couple of weeks to prepare. Jesus Luz has been invited along too. Employing a Nanny Model is the new rage. Full Story

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Shelfy covers every base

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 6, 2009 06:50:00 July 6, 2009 06:50:00

They were apart for a couple of weeks, and during that time Pip was spotted solo all over Europe, supposedly flirting up a storm in London. There were also reports that he was tired of his Shelfy, and that they were taking a break. What did I say? I said that she’d take care of it as soon as possible Full Story

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The GMD’s birthday weekend

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 6, 2009 06:41:31 July 6, 2009 06:41:31

He celebrated 47 on Friday in Australia and took his wife and daughter to see the Jersey Boys performance on Saturday night in Melbourne. Love the collar on Katie’s white winter coat. But according to photographers, she didn’t seem happy upon arrival to see photographers waiting for them. Full Story

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Britney & Justin v2.0

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 2, 2009 15:24:44 July 2, 2009 15:24:44

They’re manufacturing it already. Something to make you sick courtesy of Disney, the Vagina Virgin Jonas Family, and the people who spawned JailBait. Prepare yourselves… It’s your favourite – Noah Cyrus (you last saw her prancing around in a bathing suit click here Full Story

No photos for a week

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 25, 2009 06:42:19 June 25, 2009 06:42:19

The Beckhams have been vacationing in the French Riviera for a week or so during which time there have been no photos of the family, save for a few shots of their arrival at the airport. Since then nothing. Until today as they were spotted departing. It has nothing to do with them (please!) but everything to do with French paparazzi laws. Full Story

Future Love Triangle

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 24, 2009 08:13:56 June 24, 2009 08:13:56

So the other night, Jennifer Aniston and Bradley Cooper were “caught” out for dinner. As expected, their new relationship has made the cover of every tabloid this week, not the main story though as Jon & Kate still seem to be dominating headlines. Ugh. Jen feels the same way too. This is what we’ve become. Full Story

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Please let this fail quickly

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 23, 2009 14:03:42 June 23, 2009 14:03:42

I know Lainey refuses to talk about this trash but I’ve got the floor this afternoon so too bad… Us is reporting that experts predict a slow decline for Jon and Kate. Apparently ratings have been falling steadily as is, and now that the clowns have announced that they’re going to split, producers will be hard pressed to figure out how to transition the show into something new that reaches a new audience. Full Story