Why is Sansa Still Alive, Again?

April 1, 2013 15:05:21 Posted at April 1, 2013 15:05:21
Duana Posted by Duana
Photos:
Wenn, Mike Coppola/ Getty

Game Of Thrones Season 3 Episode 1 recap

We’re back!  Delightfully, though it’s been almost a year, absolutely nothing has changed in Westeros since we were last there, except for perceptions.  I spent most of the fist episode going “okay, so here’s who they didn’t kill”.

Of these, to me the most curious is Sansa. No longer of any use to Joffrey, wouldn’t you think she’d have been disposed of by now, especially when she didn’t go off with the Hound? I really enjoyed the training Cersei was giving her last year, but given that her attention seems to have now shifted to how much she hates Margaery Tyrell, is there really any use for Sansa? 

I fear that the answer is “to give Shae something to do”, and I really don’t know why.  Partly it’s been a while since I’ve seen these people, and partly it’s due to that actress’ really limited acting abilities – but when I saw Petyr Baelish bidding Sansa to go away with him and not tell a soul, and Roz and Shae whispering that he couldn’t be trusted, do you know who I suspected?  Roz.  And Shae.  She’s not winning me over, no matter how much Tyrion still likes her, though he spends most of his time just chiding her for being in his presence, so there’s that.  

What will become of Tyrion? He’s not happy, obviously, and not feeling proud because of his moments, however fleeting, in battle. One of the reasons I like this character so much is because he is, somehow, some way,  still vulnerable. Not just in the manner that makes him beckon Bronn to his side (highly amusing, that whole sequence) but in that he’s still, even now, hopeful that his sister of his father might show some stroke of humanity. I don’t know why he’s so foolish as to think it could happen, but he is, and you can see it in his face every single time. I almost want to chuff him on the shoulder and tell the little soldier to buck up.

I wrote this, last year:

“Once Tywin gets full scope of just how insane Joffrey is, won't he have to think a little about what role his youngest son played, even if it didn't end in his triumph in battle?”

And now it seems just so naïve. There’s cold, and then there’s really chilly, and then there’s absolutely no conception of anything like human behavior to a man who is arguably born of your blood. This is where you can’t help but feel bad for Tyrion - his bitterness gets reinforced over and over again because his family are such dicks. But I actually believe he’d like to let his guard down if one of them ever did say something nice to him – he’s just so exhausted of waiting for that day. The absolute preposterousness of his taking over Casterly Rock was, well, preposterous, I guess – so who will he become now? While we’re on the subject of Tyrion’s messed-up family, can someone possibly explain why Tywin Lannister is so anti-whore? It doesn’t really make sense, I feel. Does it?

Meanwhile, Robb and Catelyn and his annoying wife Talisa are heading up the boring brigade, but the part I didn’t understand was whether or not they’d been told that Bran and Rickon were (allegedly) burnt to a crisp? How did that bit of gossip not escape Winterfell? I know he says they “haven’t been found”, but um, weren’t they allegedly on the end of those ropes? Isn’t that what we (the royal, Winterfell-citizens we) were supposed to think? Like nobody else knows they’re off with Hodor. (Hodor!) Do they? 

For that matter, is Baelish the first one to say that Arya’s alive? It’s so exciting to hear it spoken aloud, and among all the other wonderings going on about alive or dead (I can only imagine the fate befallen Theon Greyjoy) it kind of made a moment of delight.

Finally, the Khaleesi. And her dragons – or just one, since that greenscreen/CGI extravaganza was so expensive. Fine, so she’ll purchase some nippleless warrior robots and she and Jorah know they’re better people than most, but for the love of all that’s good and holy, could we have some stuff happen soon please? I mean, aside from a little assassination-attempt-by-possessed-urchin, which was weirdly timed,  I still don’t know if she actually fears anything except the constant barfing of the Dothraki (sorry, sorry!) More next week, please. Like, does Stannis Baratheon not get wind that there’s a white-haired Targaeryen who thinks she has a chance?

Oh. Also, Jon Snow can do no wrong, I love Ygritte, and I further appreciate that there was a giant in the midst. I have, however, a lot of anxiety over Sam.

(Lainey to Duana: when the stuff happens, GET READY. Steel yourselves for Episode 3 and onwards.)

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