They went to Paris Part 1

September 20, 2010 13:06:14 Posted at September 20, 2010 13:06:14
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Thanks for your messages about our Gossip Girl weekly chats and whether or not Duana, Michelle, and I will be resuming them this season in a liveblog format. We’re still trying to iron out some scheduling conflicts, will keep you posted, but please know that one way or the other, we will break down the show, be it in live commentary format, or a standard recap.

Part 2 of the Paris Episodes goes tonight but having just returned from TIFF, I still haven’t caught up on the first. As always, thank Duana in a pinch. But she decided to tweet the entire hour. Gossip Girl, hilarioiusly, in 140 characters at a time. Love it.

But first, new photos of Chace Crawford and Blake Lively on set today. I hate that dress. But, again, goddamn, her body is...like... I don’t understand sometimes how it happens. Also, you’ll note, her tits can exist in a v-neck and not be right up in your face.

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Gossip Girl “Belles du Jour”
Written by Duana

And now for something completely different - I get tired of being long winded sometimes. As a result, here's the premiere of Gossip Girl, in its entirety, as though recapped on Twitter. (I didn't make absolutely certain that these were all under 140 characters, but there are about seven 'tweet longer' programs so that doesn't really matter, right?)


Blair and Serena are in Paris while S berates B for not being a bigger slut in Paris. Pretty sure that B is wearing a Whitney Port, which makes me pretty sad.

Rufus and Lilly explain why all the tertiary characters aren't on the show anymore, complete with a crack at little J's eyeliner.

Lilly cracks that she’d hate to be pregnant like Eleanor and Cyrus, thus assuring us that she will be knocked up in five weeks.

Dan and Nate catch up. Pertinent information? Nate is having "lots of sex". Thanks for that.

Blair tells Serena the sooner she gets the f out of New York, the sooner B's self esteem will return. I could elaborate, but...that's the gist.

Lilly's worried because Chuck hasn't paid the mortgage.

Vanessa bitches in a pair of shorts. Dan assures her that her inclination to go home is, in fact, a good idea. At which point she discovers that Dan and Georgina have a child. Its name is Milo.

Nate lands in a cafeteria with two different blondes. One appeared for a Kesha casting call, and the other is playing "Jessica Alba playing a professor".

Louvre. In a part I don't remember that looks Iike Grand Central Station. Blair is picked up by Louis, who may or may not have shady dealings with the Grimaldis.

Blair is all one colour in this shot, in a peach dress, and I would be mad if I wasn't so happy to see her happy.

The Paris shots are so Paris-porn without actual shots of Leighton or Blake in them that I have to wonder if the Paris backlot is on the lot in Brooklyn.

Georgina speaks German to a hustler, then seriously considers smothering her baby. Rufus calls.

Dan has somehow managed to keep all of this from Rufus and Lilly. As though they have anything better to do than pry into their children's lives.

Dan has to be told by Vanessa to get a paternity test, but she loses my respect by using the word 'Georgina'. Say it out loud. No, again. Like the Canadian city.

Serena fails to wear pants with a date who is probably royalty, and Blair's date is a chauffeur. Hijinks, they abound!

Eleanor is a snob about something to do with Humphrey as a crap last name, as though it's not completely anglo Saxon.

Serena watches Blair blather about suits. No boys care. Eleanor tells Blair she's going to get screwed by Serena yet again.

Nate's Alba facsimile is working at Eleanor's something or other. Her name is Juliette. I refuse to believe we haven't heard that name before.

Blair is done being Serena's best friend for this episode .

Georgina brings her baby to Eleanor's whatever. Dan gets to find this out by phone. This show makes me feel cellphones are outdated

Lilly kicks everyone out of her party. They say 'Nathaniel' a lot. Georgina does a greasy-haired smirk.

Something about Nate.

Blair attempts to divide up Paris. Serena somehow likes her still.

Lilly is fairly awesome at getting Georgina to insult herself. But still takes the bait. I mean baby.

Um, Rufus got a microdermabrasion and a real hardcore spray tan.

Blair just insults Serena constantly and Serena is back to being incapable of raising her voice. Serena is the most reasonable person on earth.

Push into French fountain complete. Amount of Blake Lively's legs exposed - complete.

Rufus says Dan will be a good dad. Incorrect. Dan signs the birth certificate. Incorrect.

Nathaniel and Jessica Alba Jr rant about how some...Tweens? Are they playing rock band in his room?

Lilly and Dan have a scene together. Nothing. Happens.

Jean Michel walks wet Serena home. Blair gets served by The Prince who isn't a prince who really is a prince. I am not joking.


Vanessa tells Georgina she's onto her. Well, not really. She should've.

Serena packs. Blair grovels. Repeat.

Nate helps a girl. Who works with a labelmaker. Nate is a wounded puppy. Juliette (formerly fake Alba) is a stalker.

A body in Paris. Chuck is abused in what, Russia? Now he's on a train with Fleur Delacour. He has a cane with him?

Do you think Kristin Bell logs all these v.o's in one day? Five scripts worth?


Photos from Bauergriffinonline.com and Splashnewsonline.com

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