Granny with penis and Oprah

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 10, 2008 11:55:26 November 10, 2008 11:55:26

Inspired casting. Really.

For years there have been totally unsubstantiated rumours that Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman was born a herm. Someone knows someone else whose doctor attended a conference and they discussed Gran’s girly boy parts and yet when it comes down to it, there is never a first hand account.

Gran is totally frozen. But Gran is not a herm.

Still…

She put her fertility on display front and centre and pillow this year to make sure you know and I know that she’s a woman through and through. Knowing this, and her incessant efforts to fight 40, and her avoidance of those women who are aging so much more naturally and beautifully than she is, it’s admirable that Granny signed on to this next project.

The film will be called The Danish Girl, the true story of an artist couple whose lives were upended when the husband decided to get a sex change.

Nicole is attached to the role of the man who becomes a woman.

Amazing.

Even more amazing – she’ll be starring opposite the stunning Charlize Theron, an unusual move for Granny who does not like to juxtapose herself next to living breathing females, especially since her husband seems to have a preference for them.

But Gran is above all things an artist. She will sacrifice for art. And she will work and work and work…

Nicole will be producing The Danish Girl as well –even though she claims she’s yet to hire a daytime nanny which is about as believable as her claims that she’s all natural without injections.

And finally….

Gran and Hugh Jackman are on Oprah today to promote Australia which has yet to present a final cut. Some of you are watching as I write. And a few of you have already written to tell me Gran is working super super hard to move that forehead. Now I totally have to PVR that sh-t.

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