Best Dressed/Worst Feng Shui: Heidi Klum

June 6, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at June 6, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Spectacular. Everything is spectacular. The colour, the breasts, her hair, her skin - total slamdunk gorgessity. But a small issue perhaps only for someone like me who has been brainwashed by my mother"s fengshui blackmail and near obsessive superstition. As much as I like this dress, I probably would never wear it. Not only because I"m not tall enough but also because it doesn"t balance. Or to put it more accurately, its balance is actually inverted so that the bottom is smaller than the top, which means the foundation cannot support the summit, which obviously leads to instability. Instability means unreliable luck and unreliable luck can bring catastrophes and tragedies and now you have an example of how my mother has made me neurotic because I can"t even do something as simple as looking at clothing without being afraid of karmic forces and feng shui principles. Call me crazy but just in case, I"m going to say a little prayer for Heidi. I"m telling you - this sh*t works in mysterious ways.
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