January 3, 2012 - Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 3, 2012 14:21:59 January 3, 2012 14:21:59

Jenn P! Happy 30th Birthday! Carly tells me you’re into Russell Brand and the way he wears his leggings? Well Happy Birthday AND New Year! I’m sure you’ve heard he’s single now? Now there’s a man who would love a big boss lady, which is what I hear you are now. Congratulations and enjoy the new decade. I promise it will be your best.

Happy 25th Birthday Steffie! Congratulations on graduating, on your job, on your engagement, AND the new house! See? It WAS a better year. And it will keep going this year too! Sara requested for you some Alan Rickman to get it started properly. With pleasure.

To Leigh in Scottsdale - I’m so sorry to hear about Jake. Joy was very particular in her requests for photos to cheer you up. I’ll let her fill you in on how exactly that was worded. The first person who came to mind was Tori Spelling because, well, pregnant or not, that chest is always, always nasty ass. I know that doesn’t fix missing Jake...but hopefully it’s a little better?

And for Micol who lost Ginger...but if she had to go, the way she went was how she’ll remember she lived: so well loved for 16 amazing years. No new photos of Michael Fassbender but it’s only 10 days to the Globes where I’m hoping he’ll take one look at Kate Winslet and get rid of that loser Rocknroll forever. Somewhere up there, I believe that Ginger is working on this.

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