Help Taupe Dress

July 26, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 26, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jennifer Garner supporting Matt Damon at the premiere of Bourne last night.  As usual, she and Ben avoided posing together. Like, get over it already. We don"t care!

But she does need help. her.

Jennifer Garner has a lovely body. And a lovely face. And great skin. And she’s rich. And she has access. But in spite of all that, in spite of how easy it would be to pick up the phone and call her friend Reese Witherspoon BEFORE deciding on an outfit, Jennifer Garner still manages to look like this.

And you know what this is? This is a message to the MiniVan Majority: I am not intimidating. I will never steal your husband. I am not sexy, I am not sultry. I am just like you – more into the playground than I am the red carpet.

And more power to her, I guess. Maybe I’m a lesser person. In fact, I definitely am a lesser person. Lesser because I would never rock the bridesmaid hair (!!!) to a Hollywood premiere. With bangs and curled tendrils framing the face and a wrinkled ill-fitting dress… Jennifer Garner is taking Taupe to a whole new level.


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