Jennifer Garner Gossip

Jennifer Garner gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

MiniVan Morning Porn

February 10, 2010 15:01:25 Posted at February 10, 2010 15:01:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Ryan Gosling, where are you? I need you. Because it’s been a long ass day. Between the Olympics and blogging and rehearsals and a thousand emails on both accounts, this is the sh-t that completely picked my ass. I need a distraction from the sugar raping poseur vagina monologue delivered by Taupe and Shelfy on Good Morning America. Full Story

Woah. Down girl

February 9, 2010 06:35:48 Posted at February 9, 2010 06:35:48
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Um, yeah, so it’s a movie premiere. With an ensemble cast. Not that that makes a difference. Because it’s a MOVIE PREMIERE, it’s not the f-cking Oscars. But someone forgot to tell Jessica Biel who called up Kate Beckinsale for advice on what to wear. Which is why Shelfy showed up on the carpet last night full of tryhardery and way, way, WAY overdressed. Full Story

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Shelfy + Taupe = Bore

February 3, 2010 06:57:37 Posted at February 3, 2010 06:57:37
Lainey Posted by Lainey

These are the articles you can write from the ass. Right off the get there’s the sense that you’ve arrived just in time to witness some killer celebrity fellatio. It’s Shelf Ass Jessica Biel and Taupe Jennifer Garner for Marie Claire to promote Valentine’s Day, featured together in an article so banal, it makes People seem controversial. Full Story

Mr Taupe is contrite

January 27, 2010 07:23:31 Posted at January 27, 2010 07:23:31
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Someone knows he f-cked up. And someone is smart enough to be sorry for it. Or, at the very least, to look like he’s sorry for it. This is one of the qualities (of many qualities) that Chris Brown is lacking: Contrition. As posted yesterday, Ben Affleck gave an interview at Sundance during which he appeared to publicly rebuke his Taupe wife for telling a magazine about their courtship. Full Story

Mr Taupe is a sulky bitch

January 26, 2010 12:28:57 Posted at January 26, 2010 12:28:57
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Remember Taupe Garner’s interview with Parade? When she revealed that Ben Affleck courted her via email? Well, Ben was at Sundance the other day promoting The Company Men and was asked about Garner’s quote at which point he turned into a sulky little bitch and basically embarrassed his wife on television, not so subtly admonishing her for revealing their romantic secrets. Full Story

Taupe’s whispers

January 22, 2010 06:17:00 Posted at January 22, 2010 06:17:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Valentine’s Day is coming up. The occasion and the movie. Since the film stars almost everyone in Hollywood, they’re now all covering magazines and appearing on talk shows to promote it. Jessica Biel ended up on Vogue. And her BFF Taupe Garner gets Parade. Safe. The interview is predictably beige. Full Story

Worst Globe Hair: Taupe Garner

January 18, 2010 08:58:34 Posted at January 18, 2010 08:58:34
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sweet Jesus she made me straight up ANGRY. Every time I see the pictures I am angry. So angry. How do you sit in a chair and ASK FOR THIS HAIR? Wait, let me guess. is ranking this as a “best” of the night? I don’t even have to click over there and I know already. It’s what the MiniVan would want. Full Story

Taupe’s little arms

December 4, 2009 11:52:38 Posted at December 4, 2009 11:52:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I remarked on what I perceived to be her Thinnification the other day – click here if you missed it – and last night Taupe Jennifer Garner stepped out at the Children’s Defence Fund in LA showing off her little arms. Or maybe it’s just me. Full Story

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The Thinnification of Taupe

November 30, 2009 15:11:15 Posted at November 30, 2009 15:11:15
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jennifer Garner seemed to be in no rush to starve herself following the birth of 2nd daughter Seraphina born last January. Was great. Lately though… This is Garner after getting her hair done yesterday. She looks gaunt, her jeans are falling off of her, her hips, they’re scaring me, and her head suddenly looks really, really big. Full Story

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Shelfy & Taupe

November 11, 2009 06:49:58 Posted at November 11, 2009 06:49:58
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sweet Christ, can you imagine being invited to tag along for this one? The only benefit would be finishing off their food. Because you know they don’t eat. Jessica Biel and Jennifer Garner hooked up for dinner last night in LA following Biel’s appearance on The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien during which she talked about hiding from the paps using disguises, pretending like she doesn’t pre-arrange her sightings. Full Story

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