Slum Lover drives a truck now
So she’ll totally buy him a pickup truck.”
-I wrote this last week, on April 2nd, after Jennifer Lopez’s boyfriend Casper Smart, because he should always have a qualifier next to his name, tweeted a photo of the two of them at the beach, all loving and romantic like “bears”. Click here for a refresher.
Am I gloating about being prescient? I will tell you when I’m gloating. This is not gloating. This is not prescient. This is about how F-CKING OBVIOUS JLO’s SH-T IS.
Of course she bought him a truck for his birthday. It’s white.
Speaking of trucks, this truck was parked in my neighbourhood a few weeks ago:
Just in case I haven’t made it clear, yes, I am no fan of the truck. Specifically the city people who drive them. You know who they are. And they are often the back up dancer Casper Smart types. As IF Casper Smart spends the day landscaping anything other than the gross hair on his face and how his pants fit around his designer construction boots.
Here she is, Jennifer Lopez, taking her “Beau” (I dunno, I guess that’s his other name because he tweets about him like that) out for his birthday dinner the other night. A few days before that, she let him lead her by the hand around the Grove as they attended some store opening. And then there’s the new video. Have you seen the new video? It’s the video for Dance Again which may as well be called Let’s Celebrate Our Slum Loving because the slum lover Casper Smart is very heavily featured...with his mouth open the entire time.