Sit DOWN JLo

January 6, 2010 08:46:23 Posted at January 6, 2010 08:46:23
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There was a time, in the early-ish part of the last decade, when Jennifer Lopez was as famous as one could be. But it’s 2010 now. And she can’t pass herself off as a singer anymore. And the promise of Out of Sight never really materialised. And since Selena it’s been one sh-tty movie after another. And it’s almost sad now. It’s like she’s grasping, she’s wearing her Louboutins and she’s grasping.

In a new interview with Latina Magazine, JLo is now grasping at an Oscar.

What?

Apparently the Academy did her wrong by overlooking her performance in El Cantante:

“I feel like I had that [Oscar worthy role] in El Cantante, but I don’t even think the academy members saw it. I feel like it’s their responsibility to do that, to see everything that’s out there, everything that could be great. Well, it is a little bit frustrating. It was funny; when the Oscars were on, I had just given birth on the 22nd, and the Oscars, I think, were a day or two later. I was sitting there with my twins—I couldn’t have been happier—but I was like, ‘How dope would it have been if I would’ve won the Oscar and been here in my hospital bed accepting the award?’ ‘Thank you so much! I just want to thank the academy!’ But we joked about it. It’s all good. Things will happen when they’re supposed to happen. I have the utmost faith and no doubt that it will one day, when and if it’s supposed to. You can’t get all crazy twisted over it.”

See now those are some Lindsay Lohan delusions right there.

Let’s look back, shall we?

El Cantante
would have been eligible in either 2006 or 2007, I can’t remember. To be thorough, we’ll examine the nominees for Oscar’s Leading Actress in both those years:

2006:
Penelope Cruz, Volver
Judi Dench, Notes on a Scandal
Helen Mirren, The Queen
Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada
Kate Winslet, Little Children

Helen Mirren was the eventual winner, OBVIOUSLY. But you tell me, on that list, is there room for Jennifer Lopez’s ass? Please.

2007:
Cate Blanchett, Elizabeth The Golden Age
Julie Christie, Away From Her
Marion Cotillard, La Vie en Rose
Laura Linney, The Savages
Ellen Page, Juno

Marion Cotillard was the eventual winner, OBVIOUSLY. But you tell me, on that list, is there room for Jennifer Lopez’s ass? Please.

This is the vanity. How vain. To sit around, having seen none of the other films in contention – because you KNOW she has no clue – and contemplate the ludicrous possibility of a nomination.

Actors need a thick skin. And they need an embarrassing sort of confidence to mask their hideous insecurity but also to propel them forward. It’s a crapshoot. Very few of them make it. And they have to will themselves to believe in themselves in order to stick it out. This can build strength and character, sure. But it can also build a monster. Because for the few who do end up making it, what remains of that confidence turns into conceit, a gross exaggerated narcissism that provides the justification for the most appalling, most indulgent behaviours.

Jennifer Lopez’s new movie The Back Up Plan is due out this year. Not to be confused with Jennifer Aniston’s The Baster. You see one, you see both.

But how f-cking amazing that Mariah Carey gets an acting award before JLo?

Click here to read the rest of her interview with Latina.

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