Jessica Alba Gossip

Jessica Alba gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

Babies are for sale!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 11, 2008 07:49:38 July 11, 2008 07:49:38

The MiniVan Majority loves babies! The world loves babies! And thanks to the new power of the Yummy Mummy movement, getting pregnant has become the go-to career move in Hollywood, yielding the easiest paycheque ever. Pose with your newborn! Earn a million dollars! Or $3 million if you’re Matthew McConaughey. Full Story

Truth in Typos

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2008 11:19:00 June 11, 2008 11:19:00

Thanks to Lisa D for sending this along – the Alba bitch’s birth announcement in a local newspaper. Best. Typo. Ever.  Full Story

Mrs Alba Bitch

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 21, 2008 05:57:56 May 21, 2008 05:57:56

When Laura and I heard last night that the Alba Bitch had quietly married Cash Warren in advance of the birth of their baby, our first reaction was: She was ok with getting married not thin as a rail? All part and parcel of course of Jessica Alba`s continuing efforts to find a fan base… any fan base… that doesn’t only care to see her naked. Full Story

How Much Effort…

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 06:02:00 March 31, 2008 06:02:00

Do you think it takes the Alba Bitch to smile? And to hide her crusty ass from the children? Under these circumstances, at the Kids’ Choice Awards, she must be grinding her teeth to the point of a migraine. Bet your boob job Cash Warren received a tongue lashing that night. For overflow. Like using a breast bump. Full Story

Best Oscar Knocked Up: Jessica Alba

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 25, 2008 06:40:43 February 25, 2008 06:40:43

As Marchesa goes, I guess it isn’t the worst. And the colour is gorgeous. And she is gorgeous in it. Here’s the pregnant Alba Demon, glowing tonight on the carpet. LOVE the braids. Not so much tied back into that big nest by her neck but the middle part feels soothing. Like it somehow tempers that bitch inside of her that desperately needs to yell at someone at least once an hour. Full Story

Ugly, Pregnant, and Douche at Grey Goose

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 21, 2008 08:34:24 February 21, 2008 08:34:24

As mentioned yesterday, the hottest party in town this week is at Soho House Grey Goose Club - a few photos of celebrity guests last night are attached. First the gorgeous America Ferrara no makeup and SOOOOO pretty! Am so jealous about that hair. Next…the Alba Bitch and her growing bump glowing in her expectant state and showing off an expanding chest. Full Story

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Dear Gossips,

“I’ve never been the one to emphasise anything on my looks…”

Said Jessica Alba to Matt Lauer on The Today Show while promoting The Eye, her new sh*t movie. Never one to trade on what she looks like… oh really?

Just a few Alba GQ photos attached below. You will note, she was not forced at gunpoint to participate in these shoots. In fact, judging from this video it actually looks like she was good and willing. But then again, GQ only features “thespians” on its cover, right?

Bitch… please!!!

It’s Tuesday, will be online all day, check back often.

Yours in gossip,


PS. To Alina: Happy 25th Birthday… Love, Agnes

PPS. And to Lara S from Paul her fiancé and getting married in May. Happy Birthday and congratulations!

Alba Razzie!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 21, 2008 15:09:02 January 21, 2008 15:09:02

Oscar nominations are to be announced tomorrow but today, everyone is talking about the Razzie Awards – the assiest pictures and performances of the year. While much focus has been paid to Lilo’s sh*tty turn in I Know Who Killed Me which topped the list with 9 nods, most people seem to be skipping right over the Alba Bitch who was singled out for sucking in NOT ONE, NOT TWO, but THREE movies this year. Full Story

RoboBride & Alba Bitch

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 11, 2008 07:30:17 January 11, 2008 07:30:17

Perhaps there is something to all those rumours that Posh and Katie’s BFF-ship has cooled. Because it appears the pupil is no longer the pupil and KatE has elevated her style game. First at the Critics’ Choice Awards, then the other night on the Mad Money Carpet, and yesterday at a party – my favourite KatE of the week – in a black dress beautifully fitted but look at those killer booties! Look at that heel! Even the hair is starting to grow on me… And this is why Katie is the GMD’s #1 asset – beyond real estate, beyond bonds and stocks, his wife is the crown jewel on his unsteady throne. Full Story