Jessica Biel Gossip

Jessica Biel gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

Pip & Becks and a little ball drop

August 3, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at August 3, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The dirty perv that I am, I cannot get enough of 50 Cent’s new video for Ayo Technology featuring Justin Timberlake and Timbaland. First of all, the song is an instant groove. Next, those Paris Hilton porn video green light camera shots are embarrassingly hot. Not down with Timberland’s voyeur-style Minority Report sections but am definitely all over Pipsqueak’s threshold foreplay. Full Story

Shelf Ass Smug Smile

July 30, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 30, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Pip and Biel went out the other night – shockingly enough, his finger remained tucked away, as did the litany of profanities prone to come out of his Pipsqueak whenever he’s getting his picture taken. Then of course there’s Jessica – unable to hide her smug smile of satisfaction at being captured again for the world to see: no name to household name in a matter of weeks… I’d be grinning too. Full Story

Shelf Ass wants an Oscar

July 20, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 20, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Those tv girls are all the same: Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Alba, now Shelf Ass Jessica Biel has joined the chorus of unremarkable actors vying for an Academy Award. Except in this case, Biel says she’s prepared to sacrifice for it, to follow that tried and true formula of uglification for Oscar. Full Story

Shelf Ass Needs a Stylist

July 13, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 13, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Or a new one. Or maybe it’s just her. It’s the curse of the B List, you know? No matter how clever the publicist and how famous the Pipsqueak boyfriend, Jessica Biel is simply a Shelf Ass and a tv girl. And tv girls can’t own the carpet. Last night at the premiere of Chuck & Larry… Jessica wearing something Jennifer Love Hewitt would wear and trying to suppress her ManTran. Full Story

The Real Biel

July 10, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 10, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

A few civilians had the opportunity to hang with Shelf Ass Jessica Biel very recently. Said she was lovely, that she talked about JT, that they are indeed a couple, and that she apparently pulled out a joint and they all smoked it. Still a massive famewhore but now I kinda like her a little more. At least she doesn’t have a pickle up her ass, you know? Full Story

Calling Oscar...

July 6, 2007 12:00:00 Posted at July 6, 2007 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The Alba Bitch says she doesn’t want to be a sex symbol, that she fancies herself an actor, wants serious roles, does not appreciate pappy attention… At the same time, whenever she has a movie to promote, somehow she appears on magazine covers wearing very little clothing. Kinda like Jessica Biel: wanting more but knowing the TV Girl Truth – at the heart of it, there’s only the Body. Full Story

Back to her Best

July 4, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at July 4, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

After a well documented and photographed trip to Europe joining Pipsqueak on tour, standing blithely by with her Shelf Ass as he cussed and spat at his fans, Jessica Biel is back in LA doing what she does best: getting “caught” by the paps running errands, picking up her dry cleaning in a flattering outfit, and of course walking her dogs at the park showing off her trademark toned and taut body and of course at the beach as the wind whips through her hair and caresses her skin… All captured “inadvertently”,  of course. Full Story

Little Pip is a Dick

June 25, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 25, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

At least according to the Swedes. Ego tripping wanker with an over-inflated sense of entitlement and a hypocrite too – that is Justin Timberlake. According to locals, when he and his Shelf Ass were in Goteborg, he was rude to fans calling out for him at his hotel, shouting out “Are you calling me a f&ck face? Go F*ck Yourself” to people below. Full Story

Momma Pip loves Shelf Ass?

June 20, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 20, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

JT"s mom cleverly wearing her William Rast tee, knowing that somehow, some way, Jessica Biel"s publicist would find a way for them to get photographed together. Of course the story that follows naturally will be that Lynn adores the Shelf Ass and can"t wait for them to get married. Bet your boob job People Magazine will likely report it tomorrow. Full Story

Shelf Ass Strikes Back and still overreaches

June 20, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 20, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Cameron Diaz has been prancing around Europe in a series of hot dresses showing off her tight curves, now Jessica Biel is roaring back with the famous Shelf Ass – the one asset that has propelled her from existence on the B List to JT’s latest clinger and therefore A List attention. Here she is on the cover of the newest GQ showing off, of course, her killer body. Full Story

Booty Call 101: Clooney vs Pip

June 19, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at June 19, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

After gallivanting with Cam at her best across Europe last week, Justin Timberlake evidently needed a booty call. Enter Shelf Ass Jessica Biel. Problem is, he was just quoted in a tabloid calling her clingy. And her publicist probably didn’t appreciate that. Which is probably why the Pip sent for her and backtracked on his “step off” stance from last week, inviting her to join him in Stockholm for the Swedish leg of his tour, bringing her on his private plane, joined also by his best friend and his mum… not unlike George Clooney. Full Story