“After a false start, Jessica Simpson and John Mayer are giving dating a try again.”
That is a quote from Us Weekly referring to the way they, and several other tabloids, were duped about the first time Jess & John hooked up. You’ll recall the two went on one date, all of a sudden it became a full blown romance, good for a cover on both major publications with proclamations of “Love” coincidentally the same week her album dropped and promptly died, resulting in his open denial, and the unceremonious dumping of her publicist Rob Shuter who was the scapegoat in a situation likely engineered by Papa Joe.
And now we’re at it again.
American Thanksgiving weekend, the first anniversary of the Simpson/Lachey “official” split, although he wanted outta there months before. and now that Nick is comfortably ensconced between the dotings arms and legs of Vanessa Minnillo – a girl who knows how to play the adoring backseat girlfriend – it’s time for Jessica to convince us that she’s still desirable as well, lest anyone should think that Joe’s double D daughter stays home on Friday nights.
So here they are, out on a date, workin’ it out again. Us Weekly says his friends say he doesn’t like the attention but likes her enough to see where it goes and her friends say they’re taking it “slow”. I say I hope John hangs in there. Because in combination with his dating criteria, his fondness for golden showers, and the skills she picked up from Johnny Knoxville in a Louisiana trailer, this relationship could spin off the dirtiest, raunchiest celebrity sex tape ever.
Can’t hardly wait.