My Porny showed up at the Hollywood premiere of Extraordinary Measures last night. This is a terrible title. But whatever.
As you can see, Porny has been working out. Feeling confident about her body, she went with black legging jeans and flirted with her camel toe. She also decided on upswept hair, courtesy Ken Paves, and a bombshell posehard attitude on the red carpet. Which is always just makes her look dumb. The smarter she fronts, the stupider she seems. This has always been the case with Jessica Simpson.
And the dressing problems continue.
Obviously this is not as offensive as those high waisted horrors. But Jess is so top heavy, when she cuts off her neck, it’s like her head is sitting on a tit tray, her chin propped up by breasts that look from the side to be almost enough to tip her over.
Christina Hendricks doesn’t have this problem. Because Christina Hendricks knows about working with her chest for sophistication over sleaze. She probably also has good friends who can differentiate style from ass. Unlike my poor Porny, surrounded by sycophants and parent pimps.
Photos from Frazer Harrison/Gettyimages.com and CH/Splashnewsonline.com and Wenn.com