Tell Porny it’s not her length

March 15, 2010 10:06:27 Posted at March 15, 2010 10:06:27
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jessica Simpson’s show The Price of Beauty premieres tonight. She’s making the morning show rounds for a last promotional push. This red dress, it’s better than last week’s Letterman dress. The sleeves help. And it’s a better neckline. But that f-cking length. When it cuts her off below the knee. It’s horrid. It’s the worst spot for her body. It makes her short little legs even shorter. And stumpy.

Imagine how much cuter this could be if she’d only taken off 4 inches?

As for the show itself, the Washington Post gave it a terrible review. Click here to read. Thanks Keely!

As for Porny’s professed altruistic objective behind the program, the reporter notes:

“Soon enough it's clear that Simpson and her friends are on a trip around the world to make jokes and get free spa treatments.”

And this is the worst part:

“At best, "The Price of Beauty" reminds you of the most clueless of ugly Americans who are sometimes seen in "The Amazing Race," barking in Spanish ("muy rapido!") to cabdrivers in Mozambique; Simpson's naivete about the world beyond her own crosses a line from mildly clueless to patently offensive.”

You will note that both Jessica and her pervy dad are producers on The Price of Beauty. In other words, her dad is actively making her look ignorant. And I wonder whether or not Jessica’s brand of blonde American ignorance will is one of the selling features. Time to cue up another “hate people” moment?

Photos from Doug Meszler/

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