Jessica Simpson Gossip

Jessica Simpson gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

This is How Pt 1

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 18, 2007 12:00:00 April 18, 2007 12:00:00

Not that any amount of surgery or martian intervention could changes things and of course, Jessica Simpson is not even the smallest fraction of what Kate Winslet is but still… both by Hollywood standards are not stick insects, both have curves, both have bodies that are probably hated by Anna Wintour and in spite of all that, few can come close to the gorgessity of Kate Winslet. Full Story

Not for Everyone

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 18, 2007 12:00:00 April 18, 2007 12:00:00

Soooo mean, I know. But I’m still laughing. I mean, how can you not laugh? How can you??? Look at her! Look.At.Her!!! She’s top heavy and she has a tranny man body…and she’s wearing high waisted pants that look like bloomers and worse yet – she WORE THEM TO A CLUB!!! Jessica Simpson, last night, Winstons! No seriously…I can’t stop looking. Full Story

Monday, April 16, 2007

Dear Gossips,

We all have irrational, totally unreasonable pet peeves. For me it’s turned-out feet. For my friend Erin it’s people who can’t close their mouths – illustrated perfectly by Prince William: beaver bucks, big lips, can’t inhale through his nose, FAR from sexy…which is why I think Kate Middleton is much better off. Who wants to get mouth-breathed on for the rest of her life by a prematurely balding, emotionally stunted “art history” major?

If you ask me, she escaped an excruciatingly boring life. Well done.

Weekend catch up to follow including the Pitts’ planned outing, Britney thin and loopy, and my Kiki in the land of Hello Kitty.

Monday – live blogging all day, check back often for fresh posts.

Yours in gossip,
Lainey

PS. Another great Saturday Night Live. Fred Armisen’s Prince rendition never fails to kill me. But this week, the best sketch by far was the homage to John Mayer and Jessica Simpson. His spastic guitar playing, her spastic vocal gymnastics, and at the end, confirming what we all know: he’s a pig, she’s a hot piece of occasional tranny ass, and he enjoys pissing all over it. Click here for the clip - enjoy!

How the Tabloids write themselves?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2007 12:00:00 April 16, 2007 12:00:00

Navigating the gossip terrain is a tricky business. Celebrity spin, publicists feeding fake stories, weeding through the sales and the conspiracies – unless you’re a card carrying member of the MiniVan Majority, you probably want to be a bit more discerning with your smut, right? Especially since the rags will pretty much print anything. Full Story

The Daily Little: SJP

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 10, 2007 12:00:00 April 10, 2007 12:00:00

At an event honouring Diane Keaton last night. All over her hair and the eyes look rather…refreshed, non? But the dress. Can’t say I’m down with the dress. A bit prom on the skirt non? And the cut, perhaps not on someone so short? Just makes her look even littler, I think. And if you’re not tall either, save it with your protest email – I’m height challenged as well. Full Story

In Love or On Stage?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 5, 2007 12:00:00 April 5, 2007 12:00:00

John Mayer and Jessica Simpson at the beach in Australia – kissing, frolicking, and playing despite the obvious pappy presence capturing every “romantic” gesture. So you tell me: is this for real or is this for show? People Magazine – no surprise – is providing full details about how in love they truly are, with eyewitness reports of constant PDA and genuine devotion. Full Story

Nelly at the Junos

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 2, 2007 12:00:00 April 2, 2007 12:00:00

Was backstage during rehearsals and soundcheck all weekend. You know how some musicians, when they’re performing live, they sound nothing like the studio product? And then you realise that photoshop doesn’t only apply to a visual package? Not sure how it came across on tv but Nelly live sounds just as clean as it does on the disc. Full Story

The Us Weekly Drug Issue

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 15, 2007 12:00:00 March 15, 2007 12:00:00

OK seriously… Janice Min outdid herself this week. The Drug Issue - obviously they can’t go full on and name names but some of the photos are pretty killer. Like one of Jack Nicholson I’d never seen before with white powder lining his nostrils. And Ryan Phillippe toking on…something. But the guessing games, the guessing games put this issue over the top. Full Story

Joe Simpson: Say what bitch???

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 9, 2007 12:00:00 March 9, 2007 12:00:00

Not that the Spears are defensible in any way, not that Britney ever had enough structure and guidance…but still. If it were Natalie Portman’s parents doing the judging, I’d be like – sure, 100%, go for it. But Joe Simpson? Joe Simpson judging the Spears??? Bitch… please. An interview with In Touch, Papa Joe opines on the Britney situation: "I would never let that happen to my daughters. Full Story

Lindsay Lohan: Becoming Dina

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 7, 2007 12:00:00 March 7, 2007 12:00:00

Lighter locks and the growing resemblance is frightening - mother daughter morph made even more alarming by Dina’s apparent quest to live vicariously through her kid. Lilo does have lovely extensions though, don’t you think? And NOT the work of Ken Paves. Maybe Jessica Simpson should defect? Oh and by the way – all this partying, almost every night, immediately after exiting treatment… she quite the Wonder Girl, don’t you think? When other patients are directed to change their habits and remove the influences, Lindsay can stay clean even in the drug-infested Hollywood clubworld by virtue of sheer will power alone. Full Story