Junior didn’t poke out his eyes and swallow his appetite only to be cut out of the will. Junior has expectations, Junior cheated on his wife, left his home, left his children for a good, fair, chunky cut of the Spelling fortune and Candy’s clever, cunning c*ckblock probably isn’t sitting well with the man who bears the heavy burden of carrying on the Golddigging Legacy after KFed’s untimely demise.
Which explains the reality tv show, chronicling Tori’s path to motherhood and proprietorship (they plan to open a B&B) with rumoured footage of the birth and labour being sold for the right price, and now the announcement that she has signed a book deal, eager to rip open her personal vaults and spill them all over your coffee table – with a ghostwriter of course…And of course, the plastic surgery will be up for discussion and her past relationships and the feud with her mother, the fight over the money, all things you are desperate to know, all things you’ll spend 40 bucks finding out….or won’t you? Won’t you help the poor little rich girl homewrecker who, God forbid, now has to WORK for living?
How is telling your life story to a struggling writer as you silicone feed your baby anyone’s idea of real work? And seriously, besides your average aspiring homewrecker, who the hell is going to buy this sh-t?
By the way- speaking of homewrecking sluts: you know those dirty tramps in Vancouver who worked at Yaletown Cactus Club and slept with Ryan Phillippe when he was in Vancouver? It appears they’ve all had to quit their jobs, tired of being “harassed” by customers and gossips coming in to look for the Phillippe Skanks. Craziest thing is, one of them was rumoured to be offered offered $40K by the National Enquirer and turned it down…because she said she was holding out for $100K.
And now she’s unemployed, poor thing. The price you pay for f&cking a very famous, very married man, bitch.
But how much you wanna bet that given the opportunity, she’d do again? Some whores just never learn, you know?