Burgers, bumps, and breasts

April 22, 2010 15:23:14 Posted at April 22, 2010 15:23:14
Lainey Posted by Lainey

As you know, I hate BumpWatch. Unless it’s Angelina Jolie, I don’t give a sh-t if a celebrity is pregnant. Also... it’s a terribly inaccurate smut source. Someone wears a loose dress, someone decided not to starve and actually have some lunch, all of a sudden she’s knocked up. What?

Girls are harder on girls. HARDEST on girls. Girl sh-t is the best sh-t and girl sh-t is the worst sh-t. And while it’s easy to blame the fashion people and the magazine people and the retouching on creating unrealistic body images, there has to be some ownership on the people’s part for not allowing a bitch to eat a f-cking burger.

Kate Hudson has started shooting Something Borrowed. As you know, she’s been walking around with bigger breasts lately due to a suspected surgical enhancement which her people have not officially denied. Today in a sheer black tank her stomach wasn’t concave. So she’s not emaciated. She’s still half the size of a normal person but because her belly isn’t eating itself inwards, everyone’s now accusing her of having a fertilised womb. She gets accused of having one every 6 months. Last time was back in September. Click here to see the photos.

I have no idea if she is or isn’t. But I do think she looks amazing in these pants. And if she isn’t, which is the more probable conclusion, it ultimately means that she’s being scrutinised for putting on a tiiiiiiny bit of weight. WHEN SHE’s THINNER THAN THE AVERAGE WOMAN. So what’s up?

Oh wait. This just in: according to Gossip Cop, there is no baby. I guess that means she’s fat. Girl sh-t, right?

Just because you love it, I am also attaching an old photo of when Kate Hudson was pregnant for reals.

Photos from Wenn.com and Bauergriffinonline.com and PacificCoastNews.com and Pascal Le Segretain/Gettyimages.com

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