Kathleen Turner"s bad pose
January 29, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at January 29, 2006 12:00:00
I will always remember Kathleen Turner in Romancing the Stone. I was 11, she was fabulously sexy, with a voice like sandpaper that made me want to smoke cigarettes and captivate men with cowboy hats and tight pants. My dad took me to see it and as we left the theatre, I thought I was finally becoming an adult because I had seen a movie with such adult themes. It was like I had crossed a line, I "understood" adults, and for this reason, Ms. Turner has always occupied a special place in my heart. Age is rarely kind to Hollywood stars and while I can"t say that Kathleen is doing it quite as well as some of her contemporaries, I do admire the fact that she isn"t a walking bag o" bones with an overdose of collagen and an equally unrecognisable forehead. She seems to get getting old on her own terms, and although I"m not quite sure why it looks like she"s grown a moustache, I"m willing to give the broad a break on that front. I think she"s earned it. The pose, however, is inexcusable. Especially for a mature woman like Kathleen. It isn"t the most elegant stance to begin with, even for a 25 year old. And on a 50 year old, it"s that much worse. This is - as my mother would say - the picture of Low Classy. She"d also probably classify it as Low Colly, which is Hong Kong slang for "Low Quality" except that they can"t pronounce the "QU" or the "ity" on one deft roll of the tongue so in typical Honger fashion, they"ve completely made up their own word: Colly. Which can also mean "Qualification" when questioning someone"s merit in a particular situation. For instance, if my mother saw this photo of Kathleen Turner, she"d probably blast out the following: "Aiya - Who is this? What is her COLLY to be posing in such a low classy way?" And at the end of the day, I think we can all agree that my mother is right. Kathleen Turner has no business - no COLLY - to be standing like this. None whatsoever.