Charlie on the beach

May 21, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at May 21, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
A few for my own private collection, taken by my husband – now a pappy in training. Charlie, Oliver Stone, Willem Dafoe, and Tom Berenger were huddled in a private lounge prior to the photo call. Charlie was smoking, sucking on the thing like it was his last…I totally know how that feels. There was a very, very attractive female handler/media minion/call girl hovering close by. He seemed very, very appreciative of her attention. He was also tiny. At least from my vantage point. They were all tiny. Just barely taller than her, and she could not have been more than 5 ft 4. And I know this is standard, that they are all small, but you always look at them on the telly or see them on screen and they seem larger than life, and then when you see them, all of them diminutive, you kinda feel a little ripped off, you know what I mean? Anyway, after a few minutes, they were escorted down to the beach, in front of the photographers, who then proceeded to scream their bloody heads off, as though they were an entire city block away. It was weird – CHARLIE! CHARLIE! And Charlie would smile, and Oliver even waved, and the crowd around us kept growing and growing, and people started running from across the street, just to see who it was, and the same screaming girls – the ones who went bananas for Bellucci – they mysteriously appeared out of nowhere and started losing their sh*t all over again. That took about 6 minutes. At which point they moved back into the private lounge and went back to smoking and drinking. Meanwhile, the professional stalkers sprinted back across the street, over to the Carlton, where some other French actor was pulling out in his chauffeured Mercedes, and it was the same scene on repeat. Except this time, one of them actually smushed her face into the window to get her shot. Total insanity. So… just to sum up…Charlie Sheen looks exactly the same in person (just shorter) as he does in photos. He’s actually pretty cute and pretty thin. I would have thought he’d be carrying around some kind of pervert bloat but it’s quite the opposite. Also looks like he’s aging well too. Must be the hooker tonic. You see? Paying for sex = endless benefits.
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