Keira"s great choices

July 28, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at July 28, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
I had to laugh a few weeks ago when I read a piece on Lindsay Lohan - something about winning an Oscar within 5 years. Now y"all know Firecrotch is my girl but seriously… I think she"s clearly been damaged by all the sex. Because not only does she have to battle her own demons, she also has to battle her peers. Peers who are light years ahead in terms of experience, prestige, and just plain body of work. Peers like Scarjo who already bested her in the career-off the other day and peers like Keira Knightley, annoying as all hell, but who is also slowly, meticulously building quite the professional resume - a resume Lilo obviously can"t match. Shall we do the comparison? Oscar Nominations: Keira 1, Lindsay 0 Golden Globe Nominations: Keira 1, Lindsay 0 Chanel fragrance campaigns: Keira 1, Lindsay 0 Pro Active Campaigns: Keira 0, Lindsay 1 Asprey London Campaigns: Keira 1, Lindsay 0 Now it"s no secret that I"m not exactly Knightley"s biggest fan. There"s a stiletto heel that inexplicably finds itself rammed into my eye socket every time I see that ridiculous pout, to say nothing of the convulsions brought on by that gargantuan jaw. But I was unpleasantly surprised to find that I very much enjoyed her performance as Lizzie Bennett, realising that while her films have not always been huge critical or commercial successes, she has yet to align herself to something absolutely atrocious, and like Scarlett has been able to navigate the awkward teen to woman transition rather gracefully. Safe to say, Knightley has a great management team, something Lindsay should probably acquire for herself. So here"s Keira on the set of Atonement, presumably based on the beautifully written novel of the same name by Ian McEwan - a book so heartbreaking it made me sad from the very beginning to the very, very end. And if the movie is anything like the original, it promises to be another impressive feather in Keira"s young cap. Now if I were the Firecrotch, I"d spend a lot less time overheating and a lot more time actually WORKING. Because at this rate, Madonna will be thanking the Academy bef0re she does. Snort.
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