Shark-Man to play Computer Jesus(?)
Jason LaVeris/ Getty
Didn’t we just agree on this? Didn’t we just make a deal that if a project blows two casting rumors that we can stop paying attention to it until it gets it sh*t together? I’m pretty sure we just went over this. And yet, here we are, with yet another casting rumor for the Aaron Sorkin/Danny Boyle Steve Jobs biopic. Guys, we’ve really got to get on the same page about this or else pretty soon industry gossip will be nothing but casting rumors. We’re already at, like, 97% casting rumor capacity.
Today’s rumor is courtesy Deadline, that Michael Fassbender is now being tapped to play Jobs. Generally I’m a big fan of Fassy but I just can’t quite see this. His energy is all wrong. His presence is predatory and edgy, and while his range is great, I can’t wrap my head around Fassbender and his shark grin as Computer Jesus—investor meetings become seductions and Jobs yelling at his underlings takes on a disturbing psycho-sexual component. Maybe if David Fincher was still directing, his coldness could temper Fassbender’s presence for a happy balance, but Danny Boyle is a frenetic director. Boyle + Fassbender could be a personality overload. I’m happy to be proven wrong, but I’ll need to see this in action before buying into it.
But let’s be real. Give it a day or so and we’ll be back here, discussing whether or not Benedict Cumberbatch will make a good Jobs. It’s a universal rule of casting rumors—eventually, every project circles around to The Batch.