Despite what you may have heard today, Cisco Adler’s rep says Mischa Barton has not broken up with his client over that notorious photo found among Paris Hilton’s skanky belongings and revealed on ParisExposed.com, and if you unfamiliar with THAT photo, see below for details but consider yourself warned. NOT SAFE FOR WORK and really not safe for your sanity – no exaggeration. You will be scarred until Sunday, use caution.
Perhaps a written description will suffice? Low hanging balls…literally…suspended from a skinny-but-could-be-fat body attached to Cisco’s extremely unattractive head.
How’s that for an appetite killer?
And still…somehow someway, Mischa Barton is staying. Though Cisco concedes the exposure has been embarrassing, more for her than for him, he insists all is well, that they are very much together and happy, and more importantly, assures us that it will never happen again.
Paris meanwhile is still keeping a low profile, trying to ride out the storm before raging back stronger than ever…which is why Hollywood Ebola
is so deadly. It retreats into the rain forest during attack, building resistance until the temperature is ripe for another epidemic.
And despite the fact that she had herpes (prescribed medication for it), is a racist and a gaycist and a generally despicable human being, the Paris Way is to never apologise. Because that’s just what people like the Hiltons tend to do: piss all over their minions, self righteously refuse to acknowledge wrongdoing, and pay their way back to the top all over again.
But that’s not what is surprising. What’s surprising is that no one mainstream seems willing to call her on it. Do you think you’ve seen the last of Paris in the pages of People Magazine?
Call me Cruise but at this point, the only saviour I can think of is Kevin Federline. Pray Goddess they find each other. Please please please.
And that photo... click here