Nick Cannon is dating Chilli from TLC
Nick Cannon and Rozonda “Chilli” Thomas from TLC are a thing, according to Page Six. I didn’t know I cared until I saw this headline and squealed a little bit inside, which was a surprise because I always thought I was holding out hope for an Usher/ Chilli reunion. Remember when they had it bad for each other?
F-ck, I loved that video.
Anyway, apparently Nick and Chilli have already met each other’s families and they’ve been together for about two months but my favourite part of the Page Six story is this:
Cannon has even started letting Chilli braid his hair, we hear.
Wait, he “started letting” her braid his hair? Nick probably had to brush Mariah Carey’s hair with a brush made from Brazilian boar bristles every night after he drew her a bubble bath so I’m thinking he’s ecstatic that a woman actually wants to do something for him.
I’m also obsessed with this because the thought of Chilli braiding Nick’s hair reminds me of the below scene from Creed, one of my favourite moments in recent cinematic history.
Yeah, it’s way hotter the other way around. The nicest thing my partner has ever done for me was the time he helped me take out my twists. Seriously, that sh-t takes forever. And he did it willingly. OK fine, I made him do it while I pretended he was Michael B Jordan. I digress. Nick needs to step his game up.
Nick and Mariah still co-parent their adorable twins and they seem to be on good terms since their split. But Nick hasn’t had a significant relationship that we know of since Mariah. She doesn’t strike me as a gracious ex. Mariah Carey is not Gwyneth Paltrow. So does Mariah go extra hard on the wedding stuff if Nick is actually dating someone as hot and famous as Chilli? Try to tell me Chilli isn’t famous anymore. I dare you. Sorry, is my TLC fan girl showing?
We know Mariah’s wedding to that billionaire is going to be an over-the-top extravaganza on a glacier in Aspen with champagne fountains and a soundtrack of her greatest hits playing at all times no matter what but if she’s trying to one-up Nick’s new relationship, what does that look like? What happens when her kids inevitably end up hanging out with daddy’s cool new girlfriend? I would pay to see that. This is the woman who admitted to firing a nanny if she tried to “make herself too important” in her kids lives. How is Mariah going to handle a potential stepmother? There’s a storyline for her new reality show.
I just took Nick and Chilli’s relationship from 0 to 100 real quick but hair braiding clearly means it’s serious.
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