Tennessee to Nic: don"t bring your Hollywood here

August 7, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at August 7, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
I do admire her, you know. Because forsaking the snotty top crust luxuries of Los Angeles and New York takes some courage, and not every over botoxed Hollywood heavyweight would deign to "keep it real" with the civilians, especially the kind of civilians who have made her husband who is, people who live modestly and gracefully far from the limelight. But there"s Nicole Kidman, hangin" out in upscale Tennesee, intent on milking out this Happy Honeymoon for as long as she can. Making front page news all summer long can be addictive, non? And she always did commit herself fully to every single role. Problem is, Country folk don"t care for airs. And Country folk especially don’t care for airs from someone they think is so transparent. Which is why the fine people of Tennessee will eagerly eat up any opportunity to send La Freeze a chill of their own. Last week, just hours before jetting off to the Rupert Murdoch Pebble Beach gala with Keith in tow, Nicole went in for maintenance at a nail salon in Green Hills, Tennessee. As one source puts it - she was getting the Full Treatment: three technicians prostrate before her, one assigned to the toes, an arm massage for the other, rounded out by a minion on the hands, slaving away in servile silence because as I hear it, Ms Kidman will not suffer the indignity of actually having to carry on a conversation with the working class, savvy? However, as it so happens, there was another celebrity on the premises that day. Perhaps not as internationally renowned, perhaps not an A lister in every environment, but beloved by locals and on this occasion, very deserving of it. His name is Eddie George, former all-pro running back for the Tennessee Titans, one of the most durable and reliable superstar backs in the NFL, with a stellar reputation on AND off the field. Turns out Eddie is as vain as he is sweet and he was in for a mani, regaling the ladies with his stories, sexy but not sleazy, very polite, very engaging, and the anti-thesis of everything Kidman. As a result, despite the Oscar win and the Chanel campaign and the high falutin" friends, Nicole Kidman was ignored. Serviced, yes. Fawned over? Absolutely not. And absolutely not thrilled about it either. So would you believe the unassuming, privacy-seeking Nicole decided to make a production out of her departure? Rising regally off of her leather seat and sashaying in slow motion down the centre aisle of the spa, arms swinging, deliberately throwing her head from right to left so every client and every employee could get a good look, hoping to eat up some of Eddie"s left over attention but unfortunately, no one gave a damn. And they continued not giving a damn moments later, when she started bizarrely babbling at the counter - carrying on a loud farewell conversation with the owner before sulkily getting into her limo, clearly flummoxed by the lack of fanfare surrounding her brief visit. Needless to say, there was some serious eyerolling going on as soon as she left. The point of the story? Don"t put too much stock in those reports from People Magazine and the like insisting that the Kidmans are popular and well liked down South. I can assure you at best it"s 10/90 - ten percent who observe them like a 30 car pile up on the freeway and 90 percent who can"t stand the sight of the Urban Bentley or their matching highlights. Apparently in these parts, pro-love just doesn"t apply to pro-business love. Oh - and one more thing: for what it"s worth, according to my sources, there"s "not a chance" she"s preggers.
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