Nicole & Keith: wedding plans

February 13, 2006 12:00:00 Posted at February 13, 2006 12:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey
Was bumped from eTalk today for the Olympics which means you’re reading this here first. The wedding buzz has been going on for weeks. That’s not news. And while everyone else including Perez is reporting a wedding in Nashville by the end of the month, I’ve got exclusive word that the invitations have gone out for March 11th. In Australia. Close friends and family only, with a built in plan B for guests to be on standby on a moment’s notice to relocate to Nashville if the pappies descend. I’m also told that a prenup has been signed and sealed, despite the fact that Keith has reportedly been cheating up a storm and not exactly taking any pains to hide it. Apparently it’s his way of backing out without really backing out. A signature move, if you will, when he wants to run but doesn’t want to have to “have the talk.” Just ask former supermodel Niki Taylor. They were together 3 years, broke up last summer, right before Keith hooked up with Botox, and the way he managed to squirm out of that “almost marriage” was by reportedly screwing the sh*t out of several sluts at a time on his tour bus. Not exactly discreet. And by choice too. Word got back to Niki, she threw him out, and he was immediately available for Nicole. According to my source, he’s trying the same thing this time around. And he’s been trying for weeks. But Nicole is determined to marry him and she is determined to make this work. So much so that she is supposedly ignoring the infidelity, content to turn a blind eye if he keeps his extracurricular playtime on the DL. Needless to say, Keith is baffled by her bizarre behaviour. And he is getting more and more anxious about how he’s going to slip away from her c*ck lock. Things got downright nasty after the Grammys last week after a huge blowout when he tried to tell her that his fans were not happy with her attending his concerts and “distracting from the show.” And you want to know what Miss Anti-Attention did? She decided to park herself at the sound board, located in the middle of the arena, front and centre and boldly announcing her presence to a stadium full of steaming estrogen. You see, gossips? Everyone’s a famewhore. And no, before you ask, Kidman is NOT a smutty riddle subject. But now you’re asking yourself: why is Nicole so desperate for attention? Why is she suddenly such an egodiva? Well…when you consider she’s had 3 flops in a row and that her post-Oscar popularity has waned dramatically, to say the least, it’s not hard to imagine what it must feel like to see your 30s flying by rapidly and your skin aging even faster. The fact that her freakboy queer of an ex-husband is having a child with someone a decade younger doesn’t help either, no matter what they say about the child’s genetic origins. Will Keith and Nicole make it down the altar? Well…Ted Casablanca, the king of gossip, doesn’t seem to think so. And I can tell you fuh damn sure that almost no one in Nashville wants this to happen. As always, I’ll keep you posted.
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