This Is How You Arrive At Court to Admit Cocaine Use

December 6, 2013 16:16:54 Posted at December 6, 2013 16:16:54
Dean Posted by Dean
Photos:
Wenn, Oli Scarff/ Peter Macdiarmid/ Getty

Have you felt horrible for Nigella Lawson lately? The once dignified and cheeky culinary empress has been taken down a thousand notches in the past few weeks. Embarrassing allegations of her wasting money to cover up her drug habit and a messy split have really not been flattering. With this in mind, would you believe me that it’s possible for her to reclaim every ounce of dignity in just 4 seconds? You don’t? Well then watch this Vine to be proven completely wrong:

At the risk/certainty of being totally obvious, let me just say - werq b*tch! She looks like a Danielle Steel cover. She looks like Lisa Vanderpump and Isabelle Rossellini had a baby. Most importantly, she looks like someone who couldn’t give a f-ck what we know about her personal life. 

And inside the court she proves just that. Nigella admitted that she’s done some coke in her life but that it wasn’t often and she’s not the drug addict she’s been made out to be. According to Nigella, her ex threatened to ruin her if she didn’t clear his name after those photos of him choking her were released. Apparently Nigella refused to play and he made good on the threat.

I have to give credit to my friend Anthony for, upon sharing this beautiful Vine with me on Facebook, commented, “She’s giving us Alicia Florrick”. I don’t even watch The Good Wife and I immediately agreed. It’s almost as if she’s doing it on purpose.

Attached – a selection of photos of Nigella’s runway appearances this week, right up to last night.

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