October 28, 2014 – Smutty Shout-Outs
May! Happy Birthday with love from your sister Jacquie! She asked me to “post some non-douchey pictures of Adam Levine”. Um. That’s actually not possible. I’m sorry. I know it’s your birthday and all, and I want it to be special, I do. But I can’t find any “non-douchey” shots of this guy. Seriously. Do a google image search and douche is the ONLY thing that comes up. So I just picked one of him naked. Does that work? Also, for you, here are Gwyneth Paltrow and Stephen Amell. Also, because your little sister is, by her own admission, all about herself, she’s asked me to include James McAvoy and Idris Elba. I’m doing this because I’m selfish too and I need you to get off this Adam Levine situation. We will work on this together, OK?