Catherine’s white collar

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 18:34:31 March 19, 2013 18:34:31
Photos:
Bauer, Mirrorpix/ Splash

Oh much better than that sh-tty ass St Patrick’s Day royal bun that gave me the swears yesterday. Did you take a good look at that thing? Did you see its shape from the sides? What kind of a stylist allows that to be seen in public on a princess? Jackie M wrote to me yesterday countering that a simple low ponytail, as I suggested as an acceptable and much less ugly alternative, would be an affront to a certain demographic. Full Story

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Katie’s Allure...is boring

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 17:26:24 March 19, 2013 17:26:24

Katie Holmes covers the new issue of Allure. She’s apparently a beauty magnate now, the face of Bobbi Brown and, I didn’t know this before, co-owner of Alterna Haircare. Katie Holmes’s Hair, Real or Fake? I’ve always thought it was real. And even Caleigh Full Story

This Is How, by Selena Gomez

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 16:20:19 March 19, 2013 16:20:19
Photos:
Kyle Blair/ WENN

A post-breakup playbook written for Taylor Swift. She tells Letterman she is “so good”. And I believe her. It doesn’t seem forced, there is no try, and if there’s any bitterness, well then give her credit as an actor because she’s convincing us she’s over it, in a way that isn’t defiant or resigned. Full Story

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Coop learns from Leo

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 15:54:22 March 19, 2013 15:54:22
Photos:
Splash

Who must have told him, dude, stop with the women over 30, you know? They have thoughts and opinions, they’re too much trouble. Especially the actresses. The actresses bring drama. The models smile sweetly, and won’t give you grief, about much, and those bodies, man, those f-cking bodies. Full Story

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Game Of Thrones is better than movie stars

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 15:42:45 March 19, 2013 15:42:45
Photos:
Kevin Winter/ Getty

Covered the Game Of Thrones Season 3 premiere red carpet last night at the Chinese Theatre. The last time I covered a movie carpet at the Chinese Theatre it was Gangster Squad in January. The carpet was easily 4 times longer. And with 4 times LESS people. Or more. You can imagine how long the cast list was last night for GoT, right? We’ve been conditioned at these events to expect that they’ll arrive just before the start of the screening and not stop and make you feel that they’re doing you a favour by showing up and talking. Full Story

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Puppies & Tom to the rescue

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 14:37:33 March 19, 2013 14:37:33
Photos:
JB Nicholas/ Splash

I am in a rage this morning. There is nothing more infuriating than waking up in a hotel room at 5am to sh-tty internet. Oh no, wait. I know what’s more infuriating. What’s more infuriating is calling the front desk and being told that, yeah, it’s normal, our internet service goes up and down all the time in the same tone of voice you might say good morning to someone. Full Story

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March 19, 2013 -- Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 19, 2013 14:17:54 March 19, 2013 14:17:54

Carol-Anne! Dr Hendry! Happy Birthday to the one with the gorgeous blue eyes with love from Susan, with whom you have shared sushi, smut, and the last 33 years. You know, women are so institutionalised around the idea of that One True Love being romantic and male. But...why can’t our One True Love be our best friend? It seems like you are that for each other. Full Story

Monday, March 18, 2013

Dear Gossips,

I walked by Lindsay Lohan’s amazingly entertaining lawyer, Mark Heller, in the lobby of the hotel on Saturday. He was on his phone, pacing, speaking loud enough so that you could hear the entire conversation if you cared enough to stop.  Read Full Intro

Selena Gomez: you shut me up

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2013 20:53:37 March 18, 2013 20:53:37
Photos:
Wenn, London Ent/ Splash

FINE! You made me eat your sh-t on Selena Gomez’s hair, Real Or Fake last week and I deserved to eat your sh-t. Because I thought it looked real and you were all like, no you dickhead, it is NOT real. Because it grew too fast and too thick and something about the pieces being even or not even, only I can’t remember because too many of you were shouting, including my Hair, Real Or Fake mentor, Caleigh Full Story

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When can Harry hold Cressida’s hand?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2013 20:34:54 March 18, 2013 20:34:54
Photos:
Jesal / Tanna/ Splash

Prince Harry went out with friends the other night in London. Not an unusual occurrence, except that Cressida Bonas, his girlfriend, was in the group. Well that adds another dimension to the “I Love You” phase in a relationship, non? On top of when to say it and how long to wait before saying it, when you’re royal, of the Windsor House, does it come with extras? Like, how long do they have to be together for before they allow themselves, knowingly, to be photographed in the same frame in public, at a rugby match or something. Full Story

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The St Patrick’s Day Royal Bun

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 18, 2013 19:50:56 March 18, 2013 19:50:56
Photos:
WENN

Katy Cambridge recycled her green coat. Whatever. Can we focus instead on that really, REALLY bad hairstyle? She’s 31. The only excuse for this hairstyle is Middleton Style. The worst style. Because she can wear her hair up in so many other different, less old lady wedding ways. Stop. I consider a chignon totally old lady mall wedding too. Full Story

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