Charlie is – surprise – not sweet

May 3, 2011 13:00:09 Posted at May 3, 2011 13:00:09
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Written by Duana I accidentally caught the end of this episode last night before reviewing it this morning and seriously considered just doing a review based only on conjecture and the five minutes I saw. But I know you lack Twitter-style invective in your life so I’m here to provide. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

May 3, 2011 12:46:00 Posted at May 3, 2011 12:46:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sorry to keep repeating this but remember, today’s blog spills out over two pages because there are almost 30 posts re: the Met Gala. Please scroll down and click VIEW MORE ARTICLES to get to them all.

Reese Witherspoon looks really, really good in London tonight (The Superficial)

Lindsay LOHAN gives back without a bra (Dlisted)

Oh... so it turns out Fergie DID actually go to the Royal Wedding (Popeater)

Sateen on a freak supermodel... still no (Hollywood Tuna)

Jake Gyllenhaal has no hair. And Jesus, put away those pants. (Pop Sugar)

Kate Winslet is the new Jolie (Just Jared)

Kat Dennings. In white. And super super tight. And titty. (Popoholic)

Thor is getting really, really good reviews. I just don’t know if I can get past the dancing. (Celebuzz)

Woah. Look at Lourdes’s face. She’s GORGEOUS. (Pink Is The New Blog)

Stella didn’t exactly save herself anything good either (Go Fug Yourself)

Met Worst: Livia Firth

May 3, 2011 12:40:54 Posted at May 3, 2011 12:40:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I’m sorry! I know! It’s a terrible thing to say. And I love Colin Firth, you know I love him SO much. But... I need you take a look at Livia’s... PANTS. THOSE ARE PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Those are, like, khaki capri pants. So... she dropped her kids off after school and threw some kind of cape around her waist, and let’s go? In some of the shots, it actually looks like, you know when you get hot so you take your sweater off and tie it around your hips? At the Met Gala??? How could I have made any other call? Fergie was the worst? Sure. Full Story

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Best Met: Michelle Williams

May 3, 2011 12:18:28 Posted at May 3, 2011 12:18:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Laura and I, who happily delight in Kristen Bell’s failures together, are fighting over this. Not because we disagree. But we because we agree. And we both want. It’s mine, she said. And I told her to step off. Is it me and Laura against the world? You probably hate it, right? This is Michelle Williams, my best of the Met Gala 2011, and Laura too, last night in Miu Miu. Full Story

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Met GOOP replay

May 3, 2011 11:55:30 Posted at May 3, 2011 11:55:30
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Gwyneth Paltrow was among the many who wore no-colour last night at the Met Ball. While her Stella McCartney was an improvement over the no-colour choices she showed off on Oscar night – click here for a refresher - it was, for me, meh at best. Full Story

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Met SEX: Blake Lively

May 3, 2011 11:34:08 Posted at May 3, 2011 11:34:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Her tits are not pouring out. Her ass is not hanging out. In fact, Blake Lively has probably never been more covered. And somehow, this girl, still she throws it out there all the time: SEX, SEX, SEX. Right? The way that sheet covers half her body, it’s like she’s in bed, strategically positioned invitingly, so that you want to lift a corner of that blanket over her and climb inside. Full Story

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Met Spider Girls – Emma Stone & Kirsten Dunst

May 3, 2011 11:19:10 Posted at May 3, 2011 11:19:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Whoever makes the decisions up there, the governing power pulling the fate strings, she is a Bitch. She is a bitch who keeps giving us little gifts. It is during these times, these times of fashion and red carpets, that I know for sure we are not alone. How else could you explain this? Kirsten Dunst was once the Girl for Spider-Man. Full Story

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Met Pathetic: Kristen Bell

May 3, 2011 11:04:11 Posted at May 3, 2011 11:04:11
Lainey Posted by Lainey

And... sadly... Isla Fisher. There are so many things I cherish about my friend Laura but nothing more than the glee with which she hates on Kristen Bell. Laura is also my producer – in Cannes, at the Oscars, all over the world including Sundance where we forever bonded over mutual eye roll for Kristen Bell who, as you know, is barely anyone, but stalked around that place like she was too good to stop, and claimed she didn’t want to be cared about. Full Story

Met Worst Sateen: Madonna

May 3, 2011 10:29:58 Posted at May 3, 2011 10:29:58
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Stella McCartney is obviously trying to stay out of it, whatever it is between Gwyneth Paltrow and Madonna. She dressed them both. Madonna however did not sit with Stella and her usual girls. G and Stella were with Kate Hudson and Rashida Jones and Iman and I think Rihanna, while Madonna was...elsewhere. Full Story

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Best Met Colour: Jennifer Lopez

May 3, 2011 10:16:12 Posted at May 3, 2011 10:16:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I already know we’re going to fight about this. We might fight about this harder than anything else we fight about all day. Because I get it, you hate the f-ckin’ floral shrug. You’re offended by the floral shrug. It’s not my favourite, no, I’m not going to sit here and defend it, no, but it doesn’t bother me as much as the sh-tness of Kate Hudson’s skanky looking weave. Full Story

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Best Met Sateen: Freida Pinto

May 3, 2011 10:03:46 Posted at May 3, 2011 10:03:46
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You know sateen can be trouble as a rule. At etalk our producers have a no sateen policy when it comes to live events. Especially Michelle. You’ve already heard me too many times complaining about imaginary lumps and bumps. Even here, on Freida Pinto, there are a few. Without the workmanship of Karl’s slaves, it could have been worse. Full Story

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