“I thought it was her daughter”

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 18:26:19 November 9, 2011 18:26:19

Is what Jacek said when I told him this was a new Madonna song. I thought that was an appropriate title to this article. It’s apparently a demo from her forthcoming new album. The song is called Give Me All Your Love. Billboard has been streaming it for an entire day so...that tells me it’s totally legit. Full Story

She was lowered!!!!!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 18:02:15 November 9, 2011 18:02:15

Thanks to Marissa P for sending me the video of my Mimi on Rosie yesterday talking about the 30 pounds of bullsh-t she’s dropping on us for Jenny Craig so that she’s now a size 4/6. As you can see from the clip, being substantially lighter hasn’t not improved Mimi’s ability to move without assistance. Full Story

Henry Cavill is warm

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 17:55:04 November 9, 2011 17:55:04
Photos:
PUNKD Images

I have a really, really dumb question. Usually I reserve my dumb biology and physiology questions to my friend Fiona because she literally knows everything about science - like even tree species - and doesn’t judge but Fiona is the worst when it comes to text message and technology so I won’t be able to ask her until I get home. Full Story

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Co-black

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 16:58:10 November 9, 2011 16:58:10
Photos:
Ronald Asadorian/Splash

Oh look! Two days in a row we get to go back to back with Brange and Jennifer Aniston! Coincidence or conspiracy? Here’s Jen in New York with her constant Justin Theroux shopping for furniture, or something. Does he have to arch his eyebrows all the time??? Said with no sarcasm at all - it really does make me happy that she’s finally found a guy who will hold her hand on the street, and so . Full Story

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Co-Skinny

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 16:28:38 November 9, 2011 16:28:38
Photos:
Alfie Goodrich/Splash, Adam Pretty/Getty

The fans lost their sh-t today in Tokyo as Brad Pitt arrived, with the Jolie, for the Japanese premiere of Moneyball. Apparently it was a “surprise” that she came with him.Really???For who??? No matter. Brad was very gracious about including junior baseball players from parts of the country devastated by the earthquake. Full Story

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Your dress is too small...again

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 15:46:10 November 9, 2011 15:46:10
Photos:
Wenn, Rabbani and Solimene/Jamie McCarthy/Getty

Blake Lively makes a big ass deal about the fact that she dresses herself. At least she claims to. She says it like the track record is worth taking credit for. And one of the consequences of her dressing herself? Blake often wears clothes that are toooooooooooo small.Remember the Golden Globes in 2009? Click here Full Story

The Oscars go KABOOM no more

Sarah Posted by Sarah at November 9, 2011 15:41:35 November 9, 2011 15:41:35
Photos:
David Livingston/Getty

It’s been a rough week for Brett Ratner. First Olivia Munn outs him as the pervy director who jacked off in front of her while holding a shrimp, then he admitted to banging Munn, but not the shrimp/jacking off part, then Tower Heist was a disappointment, then he went on Howard Stern and apologized for making Munn sound like a tart but proceeded to share off-color remarks about his sex life. Full Story

30 pounds of As IF

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 14:38:13 November 9, 2011 14:38:13

Mimi is the new spokesperson for Jenny Craig! And there’s been an unveiling!As you can imagine, I have watched the unveiling, like, at least a dozen times. I’ve also, for your viewing pleasure, screen capped many of the best parts. Of her body. That are obscured and shadowed and angled and, um, maybe even retouched, all amounting to what she claims is a 30 pound weight loss since she started the Jenny program on July 22 which has resulted in her now sitting at a very petite size 4 or 6. Full Story

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Nicole the night before

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 14:29:12 November 9, 2011 14:29:12
Photos:
Jason Kempin/Getty

If this is what Nicole Kidman chose for the night before the CMA Awards, well I can’t wait to see what happens tonight for the event proper because her Stella McCartney for the BMI Country Awards Tuesday evening in Nashville would have worked for a main event. She is spectacular in it. One of the few who can carry it off the runway although Stella sent it down the runway in a flirty short version - click here Full Story

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November 9, 2011 - Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 9, 2011 14:22:34 November 9, 2011 14:22:34

Toronto! The 3rd Annual Frocktail Party is TOMORROW, Thursday November 10th at the Burroughes Building, 639 Queen Street West, to benefit the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. And the dresses on auction this year, as they are every year, are … well…I’m telling you, get there and start bidding. You need your holiday party outfits, don’t you? Click here Full Story

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Dear Gossips,

Someone wrote to me the other day requesting to examine the Justin Bieber baby situation from another angle: what if it’s all been planned by his people? Like the ultimate play to evolve Bieber’s public perception from a teen with pimples (although he annoyingly seems to have the clearest skin ever) to young adult with functioning sperm? Justin will eventually be exonerated, (trailer park) Mariah (not Carey) will eventually be paid off, but they will have achieved their goal: you were willing to believe that Justin Bieber could get it up, stick it in, make it go off (in 30 seconds), and produce a child, on his way to becoming a man.  Read Full Intro