Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 11:53:00 April 12, 2011 11:53:00

Am at the airport in Barbados but having a lot of trouble with the wireless so Tingles will have to be it. Will be back with no interruptions tomorrow from Toronto. In the meantime, think of my sore ass. I think it's so burned it's creasing.

Imagine if Katie Holmes had to spell each and every one of these? (Dlisted)

Can we please ban the word “BELIEVE” from tattooing??? (The Superficial)

Um, that’s Nick, cupping Mimi’s Tits (Popeater)

About to become Mrs Caleb Followill (Hollywood Tuna)

Kate Bosworth: it’s almost as if… she knows to cover up, right? (Pop Sugar)

Rooney Mara/Lisbeth Salander and her dog (Just Jared)

That ass. It just doesn’t seem possible (Popoholic)

Thoughts on the heart below Shenae’s eye? (Celebuzz)

Lindsay LOHAN still doesn’t know the difference between “of” and “have” (Pink Is The New Blog)

I don’t mind this look. Except for the hair (Go Fug Yourself)

Gwyneth cooks, Cameron’s ass, Chris runs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 11:11:00 April 12, 2011 11:11:00

Next week, Gwyneth Paltrow will not sing Adele as well as Adele on Glee. This week she’s pimping her new cookbook in New York. Apparently there’s even a book signing somewhere today or tomorrow. Like people will line up for the privilege of meeting her and trying her recipes. Anyway, last night she threw a dinner party and invited some of her famous friends so that she could cook for them. Full Story

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Liv loves a photographer

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 09:51:37 April 12, 2011 09:51:37

Liv Tyler has a new boyfriend called Theo Wenner. His father is Jann Wenner who owns Rolling Stone. Oh yeah and Us Weekly. Liv and Theo were papped together in New York. Those pictures are below. She’s 33, he’s 24 and a photographer. Has actually shot a lot of high profile people including Kings of Leon, Russell Brand, Robert Pattinson, you should see his images of Paz de la Huerta, there’s so quintessentially her, and also a very wet buxom Jennifer Lawrence. Full Story

The Glory of Not Giving A Damn

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 08:53:00 April 12, 2011 08:53:00

“Bossypants” as primer for life Written by Duana Tina Fey tells a story of meeting a little boy when ‘meeting the teacher’ for kindergarten. They were told to draw pictures, and when she showed hers to him, like, ‘look what I did!’ he ripped it. Full Story

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Courteney or Demi?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 07:40:56 April 12, 2011 07:40:56

A little bit, right? And not just because they both have dark hair. There’s a similar body type happening here too. And, of course, the preternaturally preserved beauty assisted in a way that’s making it hard for me to distinguish between the two, though Demi’s, of course, has been performed with more “authentic” looking results. Full Story

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Gwyneth, Glee & Adele

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 07:06:17 April 12, 2011 07:06:17

At this point it’s like Chinese water torture. Every Gwyneth Paltrow song is like one maddening drip on your forehead, death by annoyance and irritation. To be fair, the cover of Over the Rainbow can’t be on her. As I noted yesterday, Matthew Morrison will have to own that one, especially after selling it as a new and fresh interpretation when, as I posited yesterday, what it really sounds like is just a retread – and an inferior one at that – of Israel "IZ" Ka?ano?i Kamakawiwo?ole’s iconic version of the song. Full Story

The end of the world will be so depressing

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 06:58:59 April 12, 2011 06:58:59

Written by SarahThe last time we saw Lars von Trier, he was scandalizing everyone with Antichrist in 2009. Now he’s back with Melancholia, a movie about the end of the world and Kirsten Dunst’s wedding. Kirsten Dunst’s wedding precipitates the end of the world? Not exactly, but there’s something about a secret planet maybe crushing the earth while Kirsten Dunst gets married. Full Story

Box office > Privacy

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 06:21:19 April 12, 2011 06:21:19

Have you seen it? Reese Witherspoon covers the new issue of Vogue. You can look at more photos here. I mean they’re alright, I guess. Like, I get it that she worked with an elephant in the movie Water For Elephants but I wonder if I need every shoot to reflect the elephant presence, you know? It’s like being clubbed over the head with a trunk. Full Story

April 12, 2011 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2011 06:12:08 April 12, 2011 06:12:08

Happy Belated Birthday Emma with love from Sarah who wants to apologise with Robert Pattinson photos. Attached – Pattinson on Jay Leno last month promoting Water For Elephants. And for Karen McCullough who is en route to Rome for the Rome Marathon with a group of 15 from Vancouver and the Fraser Valley on Sunday with Team in Training Full Story

Monday, April 11, 2011

Dear Gossips,

I wish I could talk about what I thought of Helen Mirren’s breasts on Saturday Night Live. But I’m in Barbados and those assholes at NBC never make their sh-t available online. So it’ll have to wait until I get home. The pictures look hilarious though. And what the hell was she doing on that pole?

I was sent an Advanced Reader Copy of a new buzz book that they’re expecting will explode on the scene this year. Took it to the beach. Nearly got sunburned because I was unwilling to put it down to reapply lotion. And now I’m angry that it’s over. ANGRY that it had the audacity to, like, end. To not go on forever. Which is when you know you’re really into it, right? Full review will come later this week. But that’s two for two great reads in a row. You’ve finished Tina Fey’s Bossypants by now, haven’t you?

Yours in gossip,

Lainey


Photos from Wenn.com

Employment Benefits

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 11, 2011 14:37:29 April 11, 2011 14:37:29

Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise were at the gym together in LA the other day. Afterwards she drove them home. Robo in the driver's seat! Normally they travel with full security detail and service when they're together. This is a departure for them, perhaps because Little Sci isn't around. Did you watch The Kennedys on History Television last night (in Canada)? I'm attaching a few more stills from the series. Full Story

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