Crank tweets: the human rights violation

July 8, 2010 08:02:08 Posted at July 8, 2010 08:02:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Lindsay Lohan managed to stay home yesterday following her sentencing. She actually did not go to her own birthday party. They must have had to strap that sh-t down to stop her from leaving the house. Forced to abstain from the circuit for just one night Lilo, naturally, tweaked out on Twitter, addressing the Nail Polish F-ck U situation: “didn't we do our nails as a joke with our friend dc? it had nothing to do w/court. Full Story

July 8, 2010 – Smutty Shout-Outs

July 8, 2010 07:46:14 Posted at July 8, 2010 07:46:14
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Finally! Friday Night Lights! Emmy nominations for Kyle Chandler and Connie Britton. I will shame and bully you into watching this show especially since I KNOW you bitches have put yourselves through several seasons of that Bachelor bullsh-t and have likely never, ever watched an episode of FNL. Why are you giving those losers a life? To Jodi G – how did it go yesterday? I am jealous of your decision. Full Story

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Dear Gossips,

You still want to feel sorry for Lindsay Lohan? Have a look at the photo below. In court. During her probation hearing. And before you go there, NO, it hasn’t been photoshopped either. This picture is from Getty Images. It doesn’t get more legit than that.  Read Full Intro

Baby makes 5

July 7, 2010 14:20:18 Posted at July 7, 2010 14:20:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sam Taylor-Wood and boyfriend Aaron Johnson had their baby today, a girl. Taylor-Wood has two daughters from a previous marriage bringing the child total to 3. That’s quite the brood, a 5 person family, considering their relationship is just over a year old and Aaron recently turned 20. The baby is called Wylda Rae. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

July 7, 2010 13:20:59 Posted at July 7, 2010 13:20:59
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Would you take your clothes off for a man who smells like him??? (Dlisted)

THIS is why Lindsay Lohan will never be sorry. Her DNA doesn’t know what that sh-t is. (The Superficial)

Fergie thinks kids kill focus (Popeater)

Gorgeous Scarlett Johansson...with the help of the computer (Hollywood Tuna)

Dakota Fanning beautifully styled (Pop Sugar)

Mel Gibson gets even more f-cked (The Blemish)

Those Hello Kitties in Japan won’t understand they’re being insulted (Just Jared)

Anna Faris looks like Britney at a quick glance? (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson go out (The FAB Life)

Two miracles become two songs? (Cele|bitchy)

Photo Assumption the Civility

July 7, 2010 11:16:02 Posted at July 7, 2010 11:16:02
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Elle Macpherson had babies with Arpad (Arki) Busson. Then they broke up. A few years later Arki started up with Uma Thurman. They were engaged, called it off, but are still together. Yesterday all 3 were spotted at Hyde Park for the children, civilised and classy and gracious. Oh boo. But we can always play our favourite game: Photo Assumption! Why is Elle wearing a cocktaik dress? Uma is casual in jeans, Elle has decided to bring the runway. Full Story

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Shia for Samantha

July 7, 2010 10:23:10 Posted at July 7, 2010 10:23:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Received a well timed email yesterday from Sam who may have to defer acceptance to grad school in England, is stuck on jury duty all week, and needs a Shia LaBeouf pick-me-up. Hooker, it’s like he heard you. And I DO care. And I am very, very, very honoured that you considered being Canadian for the SMUT Soiree. Full Story

Will you blame Leo?

July 7, 2010 09:03:00 Posted at July 7, 2010 09:03:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Ebola Paris Hilton was arrested then released for pot possession in South Africa. To celebrate its freedom, it ended up partying with Leonardo DiCaprio per Page Six. They were in Cape Town and hit up a club and had tables side by side, hanging out all night, having also travelled together to the World Cup via private jet courtesy some obscenely wealthy starf-cker. Full Story

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Jolie Fontrum

July 7, 2010 08:28:03 Posted at July 7, 2010 08:28:03
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s her new interview with Parade. Parade is always safe. Parade is probably more safe than People. With Parade it’s straight up celebrity ass eating. Which is disappointing in this case because my Jolie is an asskicker who can more than hold her own in an interview and thrives on confrontation. Full Story


July 7, 2010 07:46:37 Posted at July 7, 2010 07:46:37
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Apparently it means “Little Tom”, gifted to the GMD in Rio de Janeiro last night at the Brazilian premiere of Knight & Day. He doesn’t look thrilled about it. Or maybe that’s just his box office. As you already know, Knight & Day has underperformed, still not able to pass the $50 million mark after 2 weeks in theatres, and now heavily, heavily relying on foreign box office to make up the difference. Full Story