October 21, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

October 21, 2009 06:34:18 Posted at October 21, 2009 06:34:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Happy 30th Birthday Vanessa V! It’s the best decade, promise. And thank you for the smutty recruitment. I am toasting you tonight during Puck’s Glee solo which, as a preview, I’m dedicating to you below. Not even sure if you like the show. But if not…there’s no better way to begin your 30s. Full Story

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Dear Gossips,

There was a rumor going around that Tom Cruise was hiding with Balloon Boy in the attic. Word is he's still home in the closet.
– Joan Rivers on Twitter. Thanks to all of you who sent me the quote. She’s a crazy old bat but she is not afraid of the Xenu. I am afraid of the Xenu. One day on the local news I was talking about the GMD and the House of Xenu and I happened to roll my eyes. When I came home a chilling message was waiting for me on email from a Church disciple. Not like Twi-Hard f-cked up which is all horny middle aged, bad grammar, and the swears and super funny but something more sparse and certainly much more sinister. All because of an eye roll.

Joan Rivers isn’t young anymore. I’m just saying she should be careful. Chills, chills, chills.

It’s Tuesday. Robo showed off her bra last night and the cutest couple came out together.

Yours in gossip,


PS. November 14th – ROUGE. A fundraiser in support of the United Way Toronto’s Community Fund presented by United Way Toronto’s GenNext. An evening of mystery in mask until midnight. And I’m hosting! Click here for more information. Hope to see you there? We can talk smack all night about the celebrity bitch who made her publicist call me to chew me out because she can’t fight her own battles.

One happy Affleck family

October 20, 2009 17:28:53 Posted at October 20, 2009 17:28:53
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Taupe must have been tired of those photos of him with the others, of Ben looking happy with everyone else but her. Photo Assumption can be a very powerful game. And celebrities use it to their advantages too. So this is the family Affleck today on set in Boston. Jennifer Garner brought the girls to see daddy on break, and daddy’s face lit up. Full Story

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Meg Ryan or Nicole Kidman?

October 20, 2009 14:20:10 Posted at October 20, 2009 14:20:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Laura just sent me an email: Did you see the new Meg Ryan trailer? The one where she duct tapes her man to a toilet? Unfortunately you don’t really notice the plot because you’re too busy staring at her mangled face. So of course I had to look for it. And no, Laura wasn’t wrong. It’s the preview for Serious Moonlight. Full Story

Everyone loves Carey

October 20, 2009 12:24:27 Posted at October 20, 2009 12:24:27
Lainey Posted by Lainey

An Education opens wide this Friday October 23rd and when you see it, please do see it, you will fall in love with Carey Mulligan, just like everyone else has. She is a revelation. And she at the top of each critic’s list for a nomination for Best Actress this year. In her first leading feature. Full Story

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Smutty Tingles

October 20, 2009 11:16:51 Posted at October 20, 2009 11:16:51
Lainey Posted by Lainey

The truth (but not really) about Lindsay Lohan and Balthazar Getty (Dlisted)

Kate Bosworth: Lindsay Lohan v 2.0 (Hollywood Tuna)

The Italian Queen spreads for Maxim (Popeater)

Pretty LipGloss Zac Efron puts his hand on a girly ass (Just Jared)

No change from before: Edward Cullen looks constipated in EVERY SINGLE shot (Pop Sugar)

Shauna Sand is disgusting (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

According to John Mayer, JailBait should learn how to say f-ck off. To her father? (Cele|bitchy)

Tv girls are wrestling now? (Popoholic)

ARod touches Jeter’s ass (Towleroad)

Sapphic Dita (The Superficial)

The world is full of TV girls…

October 20, 2009 10:21:36 Posted at October 20, 2009 10:21:36
Lainey Posted by Lainey

With grand delusions. And they all believe they belong in film. Where does “TV Girl” come from? My snotty bitch Gwyneth Paltrow, of course. When Brad Pitt started dating Jennifer Aniston, she famously referred to her as “that TV girl”. And while television in recent times has provided fertile creative ground and arguably presented more challenging roles for women in entertainment, reflecting a greater diversity and range, still in Hollywood that hierarchy remains. Full Story

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Replacing Avril

October 20, 2009 09:12:26 Posted at October 20, 2009 09:12:26
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s not hard. And it doesn’t take long. This is Deryck Whibley last night in LA at Tattoo Mania with Hanna Beth Merjos. They’re calling her his new girlfriend. Hanna Beth is a wannabe model. Of course she is. After enduring months and months of Avril’s f-ckery, and the major dick deflating imagery of being betrayed for (allegedly) Brandon Davis, Deryck deserves some ass too. Full Story

Holding hands, living in the light

October 20, 2009 08:34:09 Posted at October 20, 2009 08:34:09
Lainey Posted by Lainey

LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian went out for dinner last night at Katsuya. The paps were waiting out front. There is a side door. It was suggested they could leave via the side door. Instead, they chose to go out the main exit holding hands. And happily. LeAnn fronted in the car like she didn’t want to be photographed but whatever… They knew. Full Story

Canada Post for Mental Health

October 20, 2009 08:27:00 Posted at October 20, 2009 08:27:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jacek loves Shaki

October 20, 2009 08:11:28 Posted at October 20, 2009 08:11:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

We were watching Saturday Night Live this weekend and he was mesmerised. Not the dick-in-his-hand pervy kind of mesmerised but genuine appreciation. Like, at one point he said, this is a good song. And he meant it. Of course the, um, flexibility is a factor. But it’s more than that. Shakira is incredibly endearing. Full Story

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