GOOPy bitchface!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 11:31:00 September 18, 2009 11:31:00

GOOP the newsletter took a month off because it’s really exhausting telling people how to live. GOOP packed up the kids and went touring with Chris Martin and Coldplay. She’s kept a very low profile all summer. Last time we saw her she was in Barcelona. Full Story

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Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 10:43:39 September 18, 2009 10:43:39

Why sanctimonious judgy moms are in a snit today (Dlisted)

Not a bulge, not a fold, not fair (Hollywood Tuna)

Rachel McAdams – love her, not the fringe (Just Jared)

Oh Shaki… why!!???!!! (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Madonna takes her Jesus and a pair of ugly pants to see Jackman and Craig (Pop Sugar)

Cheating was the best career move LeAnn Rimes has ever made (INO)

Jude Law needs to whore himself out. And soon (Cele|bitchy)

Are we sure this is the only thing Megan Fox did in the washroom? (Popeater)

The most creative use of tape and sparkles. Genius (The Superficial)

Hopefully his green hat means Rihanna is getting some from someone else (The Blemish)

Stackhouse on hiatus

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 08:37:00 September 18, 2009 08:37:00

I will be happy to see Jacek when I get home tomorrow. More happy to see Marcus. And the first thing I’ll do is watch True Blood. That is if Jacek is willing to give up the tv. This a glorious time of year for us. EA Sports NHL 2010 has just been released. This means he will play it obsessively for two weeks and we won’t have to talk to each other. Full Story

Not my favourite Pitt

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 08:01:00 September 18, 2009 08:01:00

Brad Pitt arrived today at the San Sebastian Film Festival in Spain to promote Inglourious Basterds. As you can see, he’s letting his beard run wild. Gross. Some girls go moist for it but me I’m not a facial hair person. I like it on Jeff Bridges but I don’t want to make out with Jeff Bridges. Full Story

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Dictionary of the Stupid Generation

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 07:14:08 September 18, 2009 07:14:08

In Jane Bussman’s The Worst Date Ever (which you MUST read if you haven’t already) she calls it The Golden Age of Stupid, a generation of twats and toffs with no discernable personality, skill, or, for that matter, ability to communicate. This is the generation that is currently raping the word DIVA. Full Story

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Halle ate a burger

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 06:51:10 September 18, 2009 06:51:10

Way to go Life & Style. There was an article I posted a while back about tabloid hierarchy. Click here if you’re new to the site and have not read it. Halle Berry’s faux pregnancy is a good recent example of why I call Life & Style a bottom feeding rag. Full Story

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Bono & Marley

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 06:36:00 September 18, 2009 06:36:00

I wrote yesterday that U2 fans have been keeping up with the Bono motorcade while they’re in town and a lucky fan was invited inside his SUV the other night for a photo. Her name is Marley. The photo is attached. And the story is the cutest. In Marley’s words:Hey! I'm the fan that bono invited into his SUV! It was definitely the most exciting experience of my life and he was so incredibly nice. Full Story

September 18, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 18, 2009 06:29:50 September 18, 2009 06:29:50

Happy 31st Birthday Tanya! My gift to you is Ewan at various events at TIFF. To Selene in Halifax – Happy Birthday! Looking forward to getting together with you, Tricia, Val, and Shanna the next time you're in town! - Julie To my bud the new "Hottie Police Officer", Constable Julie Brown who had her first shift with the Toronto Police Department today, keeping our streets safe and looking good doing it. Full Story

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Thursday, September 17, 2009

Dear Gossips,

Jacek left yesterday. Home to Marcus. Here he is after getting picked up. He likes riding shotgun. Even in profile you can still see his prick face. Like he was born to be in the front seat. We live with Beagle Entitlement every day.

But poor Jacek took off a day too early. Because Natalie Portman showed up on the red carpet at TIFF and everyone saw heaven. He’d missed a member of his Freebie Five by just hours. In person she is glorious. More on Natalie Portman later and also, as promised yesterday, all about Colin Firth.

I posted late Wednesday too. SCROLL DOWN to get caught up on Jennifer Lopez etc.

It’s Thursday – and Shelf Ass Jessica Biel and Jessica Alba continue to track the same career path.

But first…

Remember the No Kids article? A controversial defence of those, like me, who have no interest in children? Click here for a refresher.

That piece was inspired by a book called No Kids: 40 Good Reasons Not To Have Children by French author Corinne Maier who is hated by the MiniVan and judged unfit by the sanctimonious Super Mom. The article, like the book, prompted an unprecedented response.

I have received many emails of encouragement from likeminded couples (thank you!) but also many, many emails vilifying our decision – accusing us of tax evasion because their kids would be paying for us in the future (???), blaming us for the decrease in population that will eventually lead to the demise of the human race, and attributing every social ill onto “selfish” people like us who, in deciding not to have kids, are contributing to the erosion of a value system that has long upheld the morality of the human race. For real. And this is nothing compared to Corinne Maier who wrote the book.

She was in Toronto yesterday on promotion. I have 5 signed copies of No Kids: 40 Good Reasons Not To Have Children to give away. If you’re interested, please email [email protected] with the title NO KIDS by 11:59pm Pacific on Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009. Standard terms apply. Good luck!

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

Colin & Tom

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 17, 2009 15:59:51 September 17, 2009 15:59:51

Please. These men. These suits. I love so much. Colin Firth was in the lobby the other day waiting to exit. I only saw him from behind at first. Noticed the suit. And the height. He is a tall, tall man. And he carries himself so beautifully it’s instantly recognisable. Stationed at the side entrance so as not to be mobbed by the throng outside, his publicist led him out to the sedan waiting to pick him up. Full Story

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Pretty-off: Clearwaters vs Cullens

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 17, 2009 15:30:00 September 17, 2009 15:30:00

Vampires are supposed to be breathtakingly beautiful but have a look at these photos of Julia Jones and BooBoo Stewart arriving in Vancouver… Depends on how they style them, I guess, because the Cullens and all their f-cked up wigs are nowhere near as pretty as these two and their onscreen mother. Full Story

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