Porny’s skinny jeans

June 5, 2009 07:13:27 Posted at June 5, 2009 07:13:27
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s like that episode of Sex & the City – Miranda rediscovers her skinny jeans. Most women are familiar: we have fat jeans and we have skinny jeans. Fat jeans for when we suck. Skinny jeans for when we don’t suck as much. Jessica Simpson, since that amazing performance at the country chilli cookoff a few months ago, has been keeping a relatively low profile, especially the last few weeks. Full Story

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June 5, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

June 5, 2009 07:00:56 Posted at June 5, 2009 07:00:56
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Congratulations Erin and Michael in Zurich on the birth of your second daughter Rosalie Ophelia! And Sydney – you are too sweet about the pashmina! Also… can’t yoga. Bum elbow. F-ck Mischa Barton.  Full Story

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Dear Gossips,

We do it every year. This is the 4th year.

S.M.U.T.

You ready for the Smut Soiree?

As always, in partnership with The Society, it’s our annual gossip party to celebrate another summer! More details to be released next week. For now, mark JUNE 23 on your calendar and … don’t wait too long to get your tickets. Last year we reached capacity very, very quickly.

Click here and go to UPCOMING EVENTS to reserve.

See you there?

Also…

The Brange is NOT over. It was a National Enquirer story and even though their track record has been better than some of the other bottom feeding rags, even though the story of their split sells more copies, even though so many of you are waiting and hoping for this to be true, the Brange is now a brand. This brand has more to do. The brand is intact.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

Dear Jude

June 4, 2009 14:53:59 Posted at June 4, 2009 14:53:59
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Emile Wank Hirsch doesn’t think you’re good enough. How dare you play Hamlet. Only E Wank can play Hamlet. After all, he “conceived” of the modern day version of Hamlet, haven’t you heard? Wanky says get the f-ck off his stage. This is Jude last night in London leaving Wyndham’s Theatre where he is performing, to Emile’s artistic dismay, as Hamlet to wonderful reviews – click here Full Story

3 Sisters and a Dull

June 4, 2009 12:45:50 Posted at June 4, 2009 12:45:50
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Am very fond of the word “dull”. Reminds me of my mother. One day last year in Toronto, my parents picked us up at the station. We were in the back seat. My husband asked her something trivial – like how her opera class went or something. Her answer, always animated: Is dow! Is dow! So dow! Jacek looked at me like, ok whatever, did she forget I don’t speak Chinese? When he wasn’t responding to her, she turned around in her seat and kept shouting it at him: So dow! Ah so dow! I was, at this point, killing myself and very unhelpful. Full Story

Where is your tailor??????

June 4, 2009 11:31:54 Posted at June 4, 2009 11:31:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Ok enough. Bradley Cooper is a hot piece, no doubt. And he has great hair. But there’s a pants problem going on. They’re either too tight – as evidenced in Toronto – or too f-cking short, as evidenced this morning at Regis & Kelly. Like, it’s practically capri length! I will see The Hangover this weekend. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

June 4, 2009 10:49:00 Posted at June 4, 2009 10:49:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Chicken Fried BooBoos > that Cyrus child (Dlisted)

Asian rub’n’tug in a bikini is also my celebrity doppelganger. But just the face. My body isn’t close. F-ck. (Hollywood Tuna)

Halle glows in white (Just Jared)

The only way Zac Efron can find men to be friends with (The Superficial)

Gwen Stefani can wear white pants (Pop Sugar)

It’s a matter of personal taste, of course, but I… couldn’t do this (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Porny’s sister needs friends too (INO)

Becks loves pork ass (Towleroad)

Jacek loves Cameron’s perfect teardrop from the side (Popoholic)

Does every minute of her vacation need to be documented??? (The Blemish)

Emma 6 weeks

June 4, 2009 10:01:22 Posted at June 4, 2009 10:01:22
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Emma Watson dressed up in London last night for a Rodarte party. Want her dress. Sigh. Still 6 weeks to go. They previewed a clip at the Movie Awards on Sunday but it was highly unsatisfactory. Like, we’ve seen it all in the trailers already. Hurts to say but it was kinda weak. Not the actual scene but the fact that there was nothing new. Full Story

GOOPy GOOPa Barcelona

June 4, 2009 09:33:54 Posted at June 4, 2009 09:33:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s GOOP Thursday! Today’s issue: Gwyneth Paltrow’s Barcelona recommendations. This one I care about. Because I haven’t been and have always wanted to go. Finally a keeper instead of recipes and child rearing tips. Click here Full Story

They’re learning

June 4, 2009 08:43:08 Posted at June 4, 2009 08:43:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey

So young and already learning how to navigate the Hollywood landscape. Last week I reported exclusively that Taylor Lautner broke up with Selena Gomez. Click here Full Story

Twi-Fight at Blockbuster

June 4, 2009 08:21:12 Posted at June 4, 2009 08:21:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

You all love the lunatic twi-hard hate mail. Unfortunately they haven’t been very creative lately. Angry and upset, yes. But not creative. How about a lunatic twi-hard catfight? Can I offer you one of those? Received this from a long time reader coincidentally called Rob from way back during the newsletter days, right? Thanks for the support! Anyway, Rob was at Blockbuster last night and saw this go down. Full Story