Bruno upstages LipGloss

June 1, 2009 06:08:55 Posted at June 1, 2009 06:08:55
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Love him so much. Bruno was supposed to present an award. By the end of it, no one knew which award. Whatever it was it went to LipGloss Zac Efron and his blender legs who had to follow up Bruno’s brilliance and deliver an acceptance speech. Needless to say, he had no thunder. And his pouty panties were all twisted up in knots as a result. Full Story

On Bruno & Eminem

June 1, 2009 05:55:25 Posted at June 1, 2009 05:55:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey

This is the big debate. Was it real? Or was it staged? I say totally staged. A quick catch up in case you didn’t watch: “Bruno” swept down from the rafters in an angel thong get-up and was lowered ass first onto Eminem’s face. (Eminem passes spell check on Microsoft Word! Skank doesn’t). Full Story

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June 1, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

June 1, 2009 05:43:17 Posted at June 1, 2009 05:43:17
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Congratulations Christine for graduating with your Masters of Divinity and becoming ordained! Love Jennifer and Andrew. To Jenny and Alexandra missing their boyfriends touring with Dean Lickyer for a month and a half. Per your request, here’s some Douchebag, though I don’t know why, to get you through the final stretch. Full Story

Friday, May 29, 2009

Dear Gossips,

Balls! Forgot to GOOP yesterday!

No matter, nothing missed. Just more lotus on the mountain self help zen talk with her famous sage friends. Boo. GOOP should be exclusively about Party Jams, Clothes We Can’t Afford, and Frenemies.

Enough of the recipe making, enough of the Guide to Wise chatter. Because deep down inside, Moms are the judgiest bitches anyway.

As for whether or not Gisele Bundchen will become a Mom – even though Tom said No (scroll down for late posts from last night), everyone in Boston is convinced he’s lying. Everyone in Boston still believes Tom and Gisele are pregnant. She’s so skinny, we’ll know soon enough.

It’s Friday! Exclusive update on Taylor Lautner and Selena Gomez, Jen and Courteney back together, the truth about Pierce saving Uma, and with a mother like Candy, is there any wonder Tori Spelling became a homewrecking, child-exploiting twat?

Have a great weekend!

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. A few months ago the Vancouver DOXA Documentary Film Festival, an arts and culture event in need of support especially in light of all the recent arts funding cuts, gave me a disposal camera and asked me to take it everywhere and click away. Celebrities like Jennifer Beals, Martin Sheen, and Denys Arcand are also participating. The cameras are being auctioned off, film undeveloped, which means no one really knows what’s on there. Mystery! Click here to bid on the cameras. I’m going for Gloria Macarenko’s. She’s my girl crush.

His #1 and my #1

May 29, 2009 17:42:43 Posted at May 29, 2009 17:42:43
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Natalie Portman tops my husband’s Freebie 5. James Franco is #1 for me. And now the two of them will star in a movie together called Your Highness. In a weird, twisted, imaginary, not at all realistic way, it’s like we brought them together. And if they are together, if they get together (can you imagine?) it would be like we’re together with them. Full Story

Watching…or working?

May 29, 2009 13:40:12 Posted at May 29, 2009 13:40:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Hayden Christensen normally looks like a ragamuffin when he goes out in public… Today at the French Open, with fiancee Rachel Bilson, Hayden combed his hair, styled it in a pouf, and put on some clean new clothes. Just watching the matches? Or working? Totally working. He reps Lacoste, non? Are both of them wearing Lacoste? And everyone in their box too? Yes. Full Story

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Don’t screw this up

May 29, 2009 13:10:04 Posted at May 29, 2009 13:10:04
Lainey Posted by Lainey

What? It’s not like he’s not gaffe-prone. Because as well know, if there’s a way to f-ck something up, Hot Harry on a Horse will figure it out. This time though, this time he must be on his best behaviour. Hot Harry is in New York. He toured several sites today including Ground Zero. Full Story

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Harlow in the spotlight

May 29, 2009 11:44:18 Posted at May 29, 2009 11:44:18
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Last night on Larry King, Lionel Richie, Nicole Richie… and Harlow made an appearance too. Because Nicole totally isn’t selling a range of accessories and baby clothes and mom clothes. Oh famewhores everywhere. But Harlow looked like she loved the spotlight. She’s really, really, REALLY cute. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

May 29, 2009 11:18:12 Posted at May 29, 2009 11:18:12
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Please. Stop. This. F-ckery!!! (Dlisted)

The only girl whose own hair is worse than a weave (Hollywood Tuna)

Fox and Douche actually make a cute couple (Just Jared)

Model parents all over Hollywood (The Superficial)

Chicken Fried demure in her new video! (Pop Sugar)

Vagina Lips book tour (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

How will the tabs spin this Jolie accident? (PopEater)

Cate Blanchett. In Style. Enough said. (INO)

Why Julia left Kiefer (ASL)

For those of you who’ve been looking for these shoes (Antwerp is the new Paris)

Young Love sacrificed

May 29, 2009 08:47:17 Posted at May 29, 2009 08:47:17
Lainey Posted by Lainey

EXCLUSIVE It’s over. For now, it’s over. Multiple sources have confirmed to me exclusively that Selena Gomez and Taylor Lautner, SO f-cking cute in Vancouver while both were in town shooting their respective projects, have split… It’s been about a week now. Taylor left Vancouver last Friday. Full Story

Jen & Courteney back together

May 29, 2009 08:33:00 Posted at May 29, 2009 08:33:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

After shooting in New York for several weeks away from her bestie and her favourite shoulder to cry on, Jennifer Aniston was back in LA last night with Courteney Cox and husband David Arquette for the Fleetwood Mac show. You know what she’s doing this weekend! What else? The beach, the sun, it’s been far too long, This girl next door who lives an ordinary life in a $15 million mansion needs to recharge her battery after a gruelling work schedule. Full Story

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