Happy Birthday GMD Jr!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 11, 2010 08:10:06 February 11, 2010 08:10:06

Taylor Lautner is 18. Tom Cruise Junior is legal which means you’re allowed now. And I know you’re out there. I hear from you all the time. But... Really? Are 18 year old boymen really fully formed? This 18 year old doesn’t seem like he knows yet. I don’t think he’s figured it out even though his entire life has already been mapped out for him. Full Story

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You are taunting Third Lip

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 11, 2010 07:37:45 February 11, 2010 07:37:45

Can you imagine how jealous Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman must be of Jessica Biel’s mouth? Third Lip wants THAT Third Lip. And it’s natural...right? Discuss. After that nauseating display of girly chickflickness with Taupe Jennifer Garner, fronting like they’re all for women, Biel showed up on Letterman and demonstrated yet again her uninspired personality. Full Story

Programming Note: Olympics

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 11, 2010 07:18:42 February 11, 2010 07:18:42

During the Games, here at LaineyGossip it will be business as usual. I will continue to blog throughout the day, just earlier or later, on a different schedule. Starting tomorrow, I will be contributing every morning on CTV’s Olympic Morning broadcast from 3am to 9am. Then I will shoot for etalk. Full Story

Douchey is sorry. Always sorry

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 11, 2010 06:54:00 February 11, 2010 06:54:00

John Mayer tweeted at New Year’s that he’d be taking some time to reflect, to cut off his Twitter musings, to try and tame his famewhore. That worked for about a week. Then he spoke to Rolling Stone and extolled the virtues of masturbation, revealing that he jerks off to his ex girlfriends all the time. Full Story

February 11, 2010 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 11, 2010 06:48:46 February 11, 2010 06:48:46

To Rachael B. in Bermuda - happy birthday dude! Looking forward to relaxing our old bones at the spa on Saturday :) Love Julie xxx Happy 30th Birthday Kael. Eliza says you’re the “yummiest mummy” she knows! And for those of you wondering about the Opening Ceremony tomorrow night... Full Story

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Dear Gossips,

Re: your responses yesterday on how to fill the empty spot on the Freebie 5, that it belongs to Ryan Gosling – respectfully, hell no. The Five is a one-shot deal. And you want it that way. Is there a reality, alternate or otherwise, in which you would be satisfied with Ryan Gosling for less than a lifetime? Please.  Read Full Intro

MiniVan Morning Porn

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 10, 2010 15:01:25 February 10, 2010 15:01:25

Ryan Gosling, where are you? I need you. Because it’s been a long ass day. Between the Olympics and blogging and rehearsals and a thousand emails on both accounts, this is the sh-t that completely picked my ass. I need a distraction from the sugar raping poseur vagina monologue delivered by Taupe and Shelfy on Good Morning America. Full Story

She should have been enough

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 10, 2010 12:43:14 February 10, 2010 12:43:14

Not really sure why Kate Bosworth had to be at that Chanel event last night when Vanessa Paradis was there. She’s only, like, the coolest sh-t ever. And more chic and steeze than anything that Bosworth twat can snort. This is of course is why Johnny Depp couldn’t help himself. This is why she became his and he hers. Full Story

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Porny Crack

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 10, 2010 12:17:00 February 10, 2010 12:17:00

Best. Interview. EVER. Sure, he’s a vile pig. We’re at rehearsal right now for Olympic Morning, and I am laughing my ass off. Not because that mother-cker isn’t a sick bitch, but because it’s just another case of douche spew coming out of his mouth. Who else can entertain this way? Every time he speaks it’s gold. Full Story

Who let this guy in?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 10, 2010 11:51:07 February 10, 2010 11:51:07

Written by Jacek Hello Smuthounds. It’s been a while. Lainey’s stuck in a shoot so I thought I’d fill the gap. She’ll be back at it soon. I’ll stick to what I know as subject matter in the meantime. If you’ve made the rounds of the gossip blogs, you would have seen that SI has just released its swimsuit issue. Full Story

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Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 10, 2010 11:26:00 February 10, 2010 11:26:00

I’m sorry for the delay. I’ve been rehearsing all day for Olympic Morning. Should have bigger gaps now to post but Jacek will fill in for the first and let’s catch up with my smutty friends.

If you’ve never signed a petition, make this your first! (Popeater)

Jennifer Aniston wants privacy so she invited the cameras. And she sunbathes for charity. (Dlisted)

Kate naked or Natalia naked? (The Superficial)

Alicia’s amazing ass (Hollywood Tuna)

The GMD is STILL a hero??? (Just Jared)

Brad’s beard shops for toy (Pop Sugar)

Gaga says she’s shy (Betty Confidential)

Sandy will hug anyone. The Oscar is hers (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Lilo Jesus (The Blemish)

Taupe and a dolphin and pleasure. STILL boring (Cele|bitchy)