Naked Shelfy is the Best Shelfy

December 9, 2008 07:39:13 Posted at December 9, 2008 07:39:13
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Silly Shelfy wants to be taken seriously in film, joining that long sad list of TV to movie Fail Girls. Silly Shelfy wants to call herself an actor. Up to this point, Shelfy’s career description has consisted only of: Jessica Biel, great ass, Justin Timberlake’s girlfriend And even though she keeps fighting it, the truth keeps slapping back at her face. Full Story

A bell and a toga

December 9, 2008 07:22:00 Posted at December 9, 2008 07:22:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Cate and Tilda. Tried desperately to find one of them together but gave up after 5 minutes. My heart would have exploded anyway. Love them both so much. Cate wore McQueen in a bell shape with some kind of extraneous nylon tube underneath which could have been disastrous on anyone else but… it’s Cate Blanchett. Full Story

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This is how you open-mouth

December 9, 2008 07:16:00 Posted at December 9, 2008 07:16:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Watch and learn Pattinson, if you must even though you shouldn’t. Because no one throws down the open-mouth on a carpet like Jennifer Lopez. And she brought her fierce last night, oh yes. It’s all back. The body. The hair. The face. The everything. And she wanted you to know. So to ensure maximum exposure, she decided to show up where everyone else would be. Full Story

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Pitt Porn for the Holidays

December 9, 2008 07:11:10 Posted at December 9, 2008 07:11:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Well…not quite. After all, his parents were there. So they toned down the gropes and dialed up the smiles. Damn. The Brange is campaigning HARD for this one. Last night, LA premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Big grins on the red carpet, lots of family love, finally dismissing rumours of a rift between the parent Pitts and the Jolie, all in service of Brad’s Oscar hopeful. Full Story

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Even though she wears the same thing…

December 9, 2008 06:39:38 Posted at December 9, 2008 06:39:38
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Over and over again, can’t get enough of Kristen Stewart. Am also all over this dress. Don’t care if it’s similar to every dress she’s worn so far on tour. Look at her “I’m so weird and awkward and I don’t want to be here” expression. She means it too. Full Story

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Monday, December 8, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Stayed home on a Saturday night with the incomparable John Malkovich and the return of Amy Poehler and some Jizz in My Pants – who needs to go out?

The lyrics. And of course the facial expressions. And the conviction with which Andy delivers his performance…must be why Pippy doesn’t seem to be able to stay away from SNL either. His janitor cameo is another classic. And he really should think about joining as a cast member. Like for a year.

People keep sh-tting on Saturday Night Live – something about it not being funny anymore. When the guest is good though, maybe it’s just me, but I’m all over it. I’m all over John Malkovich.

It’s Monday – new posts all day. Check back often.

Yours in gossip,


Jizz In My Pants


Upgrading is good

December 8, 2008 19:54:34 Posted at December 8, 2008 19:54:34
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Emily Blunt is free from that cheese dick Michael Buble. He told People that he’d always love her and that he’s happy she’s found a new man. As you know, she’s apparently now dating John Krasinski. Full Story

Tom in Toronto

December 8, 2008 15:31:23 Posted at December 8, 2008 15:31:23
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Tom Cruise is in Toronto right now – media blitz for the embattled Valkyrie which, am told, is not a bad movie, and a very interesting story, but for Tom’s involvement and he’s completely overshadowed and out-acted by Kenneth Branagh, Tom Wilkinson, and Bill Nighy. Valkyrie’s success or failure, of course, falls on the diminutive GMD. Full Story

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Wholesome and wifely

December 8, 2008 13:44:08 Posted at December 8, 2008 13:44:08
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Scarlett Johansson with Eva Mendes and Samuel L Jackson in Berlin promoting The Spirit. Like… where’s the bombshell sexpot? Scarjo is married now. So the girls get tucked in. Instead, she’s going for wholesome even though she plays a femme fatale in the film due out Christmas Day. Full Story