You want this bag

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 11:04:07 May 26, 2009 11:04:07

It’s Karl. At the airport in Nice. I mean... I just... Love him SO much. If I could redo my youth, I’d like to spend my gap year in his presence as his style slave, existing on his verbal abuse and dying inside at his indifference. Anyway, have you heard about this book? Merci Karl! by his former assistant – an expose on Lagerfeld Full Story

Anyone can be Angelina Jolie

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 10:49:00 May 26, 2009 10:49:00

And Evangeline Lilly could have totally been Angelina Jolie. This is what she’s telling Women’s Health. “It frustrates (producers) that they've given me this chance to become the next Angelia Jolie" but apparently Evangeline never wanted that for herself. Remember, this is also a girl who feels her beauty has always been a burden. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 10:20:45 May 26, 2009 10:20:45

So many women want to look like this. I hate people. (Dlisted)

I disagree about this MILF (Hollywood Tuna)

Yes. Please taunt us with your beautiful child (Just Jared)

Best actress tries to quit smoking (The Superficial)

Becks and a little girl! Awwww! (Pop Sugar)

Another reason why Karl hates Klum (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Twi-hards simultaneously orgasm (INO)

Going bald for Mimi!!!! (Cele|bitchy)

Jerry Springer goes to London (Holy Moly)

This is Avril...but it could totally be Miley (The Blemish)

She’s singing again

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 09:07:00 May 26, 2009 09:07:00

Scarlett Johansson. This time an album of duets with Pete Yorn called Break Up that was recorded before her Tom Waits f-ckery in 2006 due out on September 8th but the first single Relator is available today. Click here to listen. It’s actually. Full Story

Scabby and Spittle

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 08:44:34 May 26, 2009 08:44:34

Not together, no. But can you imagine? They were however both at the beach yesterday in Malibu. Spittle and his weird spittle mouth looking like he’s posing for the paps and the Filthy Canadian Scab in white, as usual, with the man they’re calling her latest – apparently they met at a deluxe trailer park – enjoying Memorial Day Monday. Full Story

Goodnight Saigon SNL

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 07:50:04 May 26, 2009 07:50:04

My husband’s hero. He memorises Will’s facial expressions. Like that part in Old School when Frank the Tanks hits off the beer funnel for the first time in years and it touches his mouth and he’s all like – it's so good once it hits your lips. For my husband, this is one of the greatest scenes in the history of movies. Full Story

Marriage repair

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 07:29:00 May 26, 2009 07:29:00

A couple months ago they were on life support. Kate Beckinsale had taken off for London without warning husband Len Wiseman, stayed there a month, found daughter Lily a new school, leaving Len supposedly baffled about what prompted her decision. Her rep vehemently denied there was anything wrong between the two. Full Story

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A list at the beach

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 07:01:20 May 26, 2009 07:01:20

Are Tom Hanks’s jeans too tight? I don’t want Tom Hanks to be Tight Jeans Guy. Not his best moment. So apparently Joel Silver threw a Memorial Day party or something and a lot of famous people showed up including Tom and Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal. Hm. Jakey looks hot in that hat. Full Story

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Iron Man Memorial Day

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 06:49:08 May 26, 2009 06:49:08

He spent the weekend at the beach in Malibu, with wife Susan, and his son, surrounded by friends, and of course his lunch pail filled with vitamins and spinach pills. Adorable. Various photos attached of Robert Downey Jr enjoying down time after weeks of shooting the sequel and working out like a motherf-cker. Full Story

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May 26, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 26, 2009 06:34:00 May 26, 2009 06:34:00

Emma, congratulations on your new fashion blog, wwwwhattowear.blogspot.com, all about the pretty stuff you find while spending far too much time shopping on the internet—it is fabulous and fun, just like you! Love Miriam. Congratulations Karen on your wedding this weekend in Vermont! Wishing you so many laughs, only happy tears, wonderful weather, and so much love…with your bestie Jennifer by your side always. Full Story

Monday, May 25, 2009

Dear Gossips,

Am back from Cannes. It’s great to be home. But then sometimes I get the Grey Goose shakes and I remember what a crazy week it was.

My inbox was crushed on Friday during travel. Twi-hards were beside themselves over a Life & Style report about Robert Pattinson hooking up. Scroll down or click here to review the full report. Pattinson was totally sold out. And by a peer too.

Also … the Brange video from Les Marches. Have you watched it yet? See below. The way Brad Pitt works a carpet – oh la.

It’s Monday – am blogging all day, regular schedule. Check out Katie Holmes and her freakish pants.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Friday Night Lights. Season 3. On DVD. I know you want it. Includes deleted scenes and 13 more minutes from the last episode. More Riggins! More Saracen! There are 5 copies available to give away. If you’re interested, please email [email protected] with FNL 3 as the title before midnight Pacific on Friday, May 29, 2009.  Standard terms apply.  And remember, there are 2 more seasons in the works. Good taste is on life support. Won’t you help it live?