The Madonna Debate

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 08:20:01 May 5, 2009 08:20:01

We spent a significant amount time on this last night over Skype, Michelle and I. Obviously Madonna wasn’t hoping to make the Best Dressed List with this selection. Madonna is many things. But Madonna is not stupid. She wasn’t looking to the MiniVan to gasp with delight over that thing in her head and her muscles popping like flashbulbs. Full Story

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Stella’s girls

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:53:37 May 5, 2009 07:53:37

They’ve been close for years, now three modern mothers – Kate Hudson, Liv Tyler, Stella McCartney. And all similarly pedigreed. Kate is a regular with Stella at this event. This year, Stella brought two dates and dressed them both, naturally, in her designs. Nothing super spectacular. She in fact went riskier than her muses. Full Story

Leighton > Lively

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:48:28 May 5, 2009 07:48:28

90% of you and an entire fleet of MiniVans will disagree… Blake’s was the safer choice. Pretty and soothing in blue and blonde and boring as f-ck and a cheap slit too. It’s Versace. I’m asleep. Like when Serena talks in her one voice, incapable of modulation. Lulls you into a coma. Full Story

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Alba outclassed

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:32:26 May 5, 2009 07:32:26

She really was. Or, more accurately, perhaps it was her designer Jason Wu. This dress seems like it’s 2 seasons old and was last worn at some Us Weekly party by Lauren Conrad. That hurts. And the tights, not feeling the tights. On the plus side: am all over the lipstick. Fuchsia looks good on the Alba Demon who smiled almost like she meant it. Full Story

Lazy Dunst

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:28:08 May 5, 2009 07:28:08

She’s fired. For many reasons, not just last night. The Xenu sympathising doesn’t sit well. And then the whole rehab for “depression” business which, as you’d expect, nobody bought especially not after Sundance that year when she was passing out Lindsay Lohan styles at every party. Full Story

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Suits!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:15:29 May 5, 2009 07:15:29

Love them both. In fact, I probably love Rihanna’s more than Lake Bell’s. Lake’s is super flattering and she’s more beautiful here than I’ve ever seen her but it’s also distinctly … stripper-y. Rihanna though, Rihanna is pure drama. Outrage? Let me guess – you hate it. Full Story

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Best Hair: Marion Cotillard

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 07:06:58 May 5, 2009 07:06:58

She wore Dior and brought the girls out. My Marion has great breasts, non? Accompanied by John Galliano, sexy and sweet at the same time, and perfectly styled, every detail especially the sideswept hair which I’ve never tried but have always wanted to and for 5 minutes considered cutting my hair but then what would happen on all the days in between, when it’s boring and flat at a no-man’s length and, obviously, I don’t have her face? Am sad Marion did not come with Guillaume Canet. Full Story

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Worst Hair: Anne Hathaway

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 06:58:00 May 5, 2009 06:58:00

Ugh. Make it go away. If I look too long it’s like a squirrel is attacking my eyes. An old cranky squirrel, bitter at life, two divorces already, a third on the way, and maybe a little drinking problem. Or her big-haired, Texas beard in Brokeback Mountain. Either way, why would Anne Hathaway age herself 20 years on this night when 14 year old models are walking around barely able to support themselves on their gangly legs? Dumb. Full Story

Best Met Couples!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 06:54:00 May 5, 2009 06:54:00

First the newlyweds Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady – she’s in Versace, he’s adorable, and it’s all about the legs and the shoes. Shoe Porn! Sigh…this is the beach hair I’ve always wanted. It’s what happens when you’re Gisele Bundchen. Like she really doesn’t have to try all that hard. Full Story

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May 5, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 5, 2009 06:15:15 May 5, 2009 06:15:15

Happy 26th Birthday April! With love from your friend Kennedy. To the lovely ladies of LSC – Happy Cinco de Mayo from Rebecca and Alejandro who is healthy and thriving and loving Mexico!  Full Story

Monday, May 4, 2009

Dear Gossips,

It’s tonight. Are you ready?

The Costume Institute Gala… my favourite carpet. The best carpet. SO much drama, SO much bitch, SO much style. And SO much style miss. Sigh. Wish I was in New York. Because it’s one thing to see the pictures, it’s entirely another to watch these people jockeying for position, making their way up the steps of the Museum, some totally belonging, some trying desperately hard to belong.

Like Victoria Beckham.

Here she is arriving at JFK yesterday in that ridiculous black cap making sure no one could miss her. She’ll be seated at the Marc Jacobs table (he’s hosting with Kate Moss, Justin Timberlake, and Anna Wintour) alongside Madonna, Anne Hathaway, Winona Ryder, and Rihanna. The theme this year is Model As Muse. Traditionally Mrs Beckham has not fared well at this event. You remember her white Armani disaster last year, non? Two years before that it was a busted weave and a red prom dress – she was totally out of her league.

You know how hard she tries. She tries SO hard. You know she’ll be trying hard tonight. Her neck will be cocked and her veins will pop and those concrete tits will offend Anna Wintour and she’ll pose her Posh hardest and Coco Rocha will glide by effortlessly and everyone will see the difference. Can’t. Wait.

A full report tomorrow…

For today much to catch up on from the weekend and a sexy ass way to start the week.

Monday – am online all day. Check back often.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS Want to meet Bruce Springsteen?

He’s donated 4 tickets (2 pairs), amazing seats, including a private backstage meet and greet with the Boss (!!!) for auction in support of FoodShare. Springsteen will MATCH the amount raised and has pledged an extra $50K if more than $10K is contributed!!! Matching gifts! It’s what the Brange should be doing! And the Boss is doing it now! Click here for more information and to bid for your chance to hang out with Bruce Springsteen.

Photos from Wenn.com and Ron Asadorian/Splashnewsonline.com