What is CHOOP? CHOOP is not GOOP. CHOOP is the antithesis of GOOP. GOOP is a night at a hotel no one can afford. GOOP is accessorising with Chopard. GOOP is using tuna steaks for tuna sandwiches. GOOP is emailing Deepak Chopra for a tea leaf interpretation whenever your daughter has a bad dream. In other words, GOOP is what Gwynnie would do. Full Story
Not sure which one. And it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that this is Christian Bale last night at the Hollywood Film Festival alongside The Dark Knight director Christopher Nolan and it’s been a long time because of course he’s intensely private, even though he lives in LA, he manages to stay under the radar which just goes to show you it is indeed possible so f&ck off Ben Affleck and the others for complaining about the intrusion when the truth is you go courting it every day anyway. Full Story
That’s all she’s got? That’s all she brought? No one cared about Easy Virtue at TIFF. Like seriously, it came and went and received rather tepid reviews and Shelf Ass had to restrategise. Next thing you know, she and Pipsqueak are photographed every f-cking day on holiday in Rome Coincidence or conspiracy? Now the studio is pushing her out hard front and centre as the driving force for the film. Full Story
Here’s 30 year old Ali Lohan trying to look like a teenager again at the Animals Fair Magazine Halloween Party last night. I think her costume was a cat. A skanky cat. A cat with a see through top showing off her abs and tacky ass acrylic nails. Ali also appears to be borrowing her sister’s dirty face. Full Story
Oh there he is. While Gwyneth Paltrow has dutifully performed red carpet responsibilities for their film Two Lovers in Cannes and most recently in London last week, Joaquin Phoenix has been missing for months, finally turning up last night at a star studded benefit in San Francisco, arriving with close friend Casey Affleck, looking like all kinds of sh-t. Full Story
To Auntie Carrie from Auntie Lisa—who is eagerly awaiting the sequel this summer! Congratulations to the newly engaged Rachel H who is so in love from your friend Alex F who is so happy for you. To Rhonda with the broken wrist – sending you my very, very best get well wishes. And I’m totally there with you about the suckiness of dependency. Full Story
We spent our final night in London at a dance party – our own, in jammies, givin’er to “party bangers” on MTV UK, inspired by Beyonce’s Crazy In Love video (KILLER!) and culminating in the Sister Act 2 medley off YouTube as requested by Duana… because there’s always time for a little Joyful, Joyful.
Lauryn Hill. We miss you.
Monday – am home now, blogging on regular schedule and all day today. Check back often!
Yours in gossip,
PS. Besties in Bed is not Adrien Brody and Mark Ruffalo.
PPS. Why does Chris Martin suck major ass these days? Did you see Coldplay on SNL? My husband and I, and we are fans, we own several copies of every album, we have spent good money on multiple concerts, are becoming more and more embarrassed seeing Chris sing live…he canNOT hit the high notes. And what was once a charming dork has now become a cheese dork. Totally not the same.
PPPS. LOVE the name Archie!
PPPPS. The girls and I, while in London, we created the anti-GOOP. Launching soon. Stay tuned.
PPPPPS. Jennifer Garner is not a warring bitch. Neither is Sienna Miller.
Rachel Weisz at the Brothers Bloom premiere in London. Right? Like architecture. But fashion. Wicked. Brothers Bloom opens some time in December. Duana and Michelle loved it at TIFF. And we all had our very own Adrien Brody moment at the Park Hyatt during the festival too. Which is why it’s such a shame. Full Story
Duana, Michelle, and I… we came home from Europe OBSESSED with Russians. Like, we can’t believe we were so late to arrive at the Russian party. Because Russians are amazing. We are all about Russians. Or at least the ones on our trip. As I mentioned last week, Grey Goose invited international media to Europe to promote their product and to introduce their new flavours. Full Story
The world has stopped. It stops twice a year whenever Victoria Beckham gives her bunions a break from the stilettos. Can you believe it? This is Posh at her kid’s soccer game the other day, where she’s been known to put on a pair of sky highs and golf clap occasionally, in flip flops and David’s jeans. Full Story