Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 10:40:19 June 12, 2009 10:40:19

JailBait Miley Cyrus has a weird hairline and a new hole (Dlisted)

Lilo and a lace ass (Hollywood Tuna)

How Ebola can infect an ENTIRE club (The Superficial)

My shamef-ck Ed Westwick is SO much cuter in jeans (Just Jared)

Hot Becks and his boys and the concrete tits on holiday (Pop Sugar)

He poses with stuffed animals and STILL gets all the girls (Drunken Stepfather site NSFW)

Is there a course on email etiquette? (Towleroad)

Pitt Porn can be a life saver (INO)

Does brown and black work on Becks? (Zoe Griffin)

Robert Pattinson calls it like it is: Edward Cullen is insecure and paranoid. How is this the perfect man? (ASL)

Portraits of Patrick

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 09:05:17 June 12, 2009 09:05:17

Gorgeous. He's in France for the LeMans 24 hour race enjoying his Grey's hiatus and the benefits of his paycheque...from the show and movies like Made of Honour. Patrick may be the perennial silver medallist in the Sexiest Man sweepstakes but having achieved a rare teen to bleak to adult success comeback in Hollywood, he - unlike so many of his female tv contemporaries - appears to have tamed the itch to overreach. Full Story

She dresses her real age

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 08:38:39 June 12, 2009 08:38:39

Or his age. Supposedly she’s not yet 40. Don’t know anyone who believes this. You? Last night Catherine Zeta Jones accompanied her husband Michael Douglas to the AFI Tribute in his honour. This dress is ok, I guess, for a 60 year old? Like, her mother in law dresses more contemporarily than she does, though I suppose, marrying who she married, Zeta kinda has to age the wardrobe accordingly. Full Story

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Courtside awkward

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 07:46:31 June 12, 2009 07:46:31

Over or not over? Last night in Orlando, both Rihanna and Chris Brown were courtside to watch the Lakers defeat the Magic in Game 4. Derek Fisher is so f-cking clutch. Though they sat apart and did not appear to engage at all, curiously enough, both Us Weekly Full Story

They give her Mercy

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 07:11:54 June 12, 2009 07:11:54

After all the shenanigans from earlier this week, Malawian officials have approved Madonna’s adoption, overruling an earlier decision denying her attempt on the grounds that she hadn’t spent enough time in the country. These are the benefits of unlimited resources. Here’s my favourite detail about the announcement: Madge’s lawyer revealed that “It's the early hours in New York now but my client has been awake all night waiting for this”, like staying up for something so significant is such an extraordinary accomplishment. Full Story

A better Benicio

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 07:00:51 June 12, 2009 07:00:51

Last time we saw him – click here – he was decidedly Elvis, the later years. Last night at the AFI tribute to Michael Douglas, MUCH much better. Benicio must be shooting soon. Full Story

June 12, 2009 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 12, 2009 06:49:25 June 12, 2009 06:49:25

Happy Birthday to Stephanie K from … J. Jackson??? To Melissa – Happy 30th Birthday! And the best gift in 2 weeks right? I have no words of wisdom, only to tell you, given that my cousin Cat hasn’t slept in over a month, do as much as you can of it now. Because it’ll be years before you get the chance again! Happy 35th birthday Billy! Remember our deal? I've been waiting more than a decade! Lots of love, Shasta And to Margaret J for all your hard work coordinating the outdoor event yesterday. Full Story

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Dear Gossips,

That foul stench you woke up to this morning comes from Ebola Paris Hilton. It’s single now, no longer dating that useless f-ck Doug Reinhardt. Scroll down for the full article on who it’s hunting now. The most hunted boy in the world is in New York. How long before Ebola spreads itself over to New York?

Part of me actually wants to see it, or at least see it try it, because maybe that’s the only way to get rid of it. There is no Ebola Hilton vaccine. But Ebola Hilton has yet to take on the Twi-hard crazy. Could the Twi-hard crazy finally be the antidote we’ve been looking for? Can the Twi-hard crazy eradicate Ebola’s black hole vagina and her disease?

See? Now you wanna know.

It’s Thursday. Didn’t plan it that way but we’re heavy on the man hotness today. Am blogging until my flight. To Toronto for 2 weeks. My mother is making me host (translation: pay for) a Chinese lady dinner on Friday night. She has already planned my outfit. Can’t wait.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

Do you love Johnny Depp?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2009 12:18:26 June 11, 2009 12:18:26

If you do, you will love him even MORE after this video. Thanks C! It’s from 2 nights ago in Puerto Rico, on his birthday. They surprised him with a cake. And sang for him. And he seems so humbled and touched. And sweet. And appreciative. He doesn’t complain about being “subjected to harassment” like Ryan Reynolds. Full Story

Do you want to touch it?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 11, 2009 11:34:31 June 11, 2009 11:34:31

Finally a good look at Kristen Stewart’s Joan Jett hair. Looks amazing. Really, really suits her. Twi-hards of course are now stabbing themselves, worried that Edward won’t love Bella anymore because she no longer has “pretty girl” hair. Please. These are the same people who think boys wear blue, girls wear pink, and gay ain’t right. Full Story

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