May 15, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

May 15, 2008 03:09:24 Posted at May 15, 2008 03:09:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Congratulations to Kerri in Seattle who is marrying Bill! Brodie is fine but missing you. Lots of love from Joanne, Duke, Scout, and Brodie. To Aurelie whose mat leave is around the corner – the group at BPR send you their love and can’t wait to meet Loic! Love the Halloween costume! All the best to Jeremy and Sheilah for finally making it honest! Full Story

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Dear Gossips,

4 fllights from hell and stuck in airport limbo for too long. Have just arrived in Nice after 27 hrs of travel, am en route to Cannes and will post as soon as possible before dashing to festival opening gala. Please check back in a bit. Thank Xenu for blackberries!

So sorry for the delay. Thank you, love you, owe you.


Smut from Cannes! The Festival kicks off tonight, we had several flights from hell but better times are ahead because for the next two weeks, the Riviera is celebrity central! Celebrities and Eurotrash – it’s the best combination!


Will be blogging every day between shoots and interviews and screenings and even on weekends. Please do check back often. Attached – Cannes jury member Natalie Portman looking ridiculously beautiful on the Croisette yesterday and at the Martinez being greeted affectionately by a very good friend. Interestingly enough, Gael Garcia Bernal is here. His movie Blindness – the gala premiere is tonight.


Sean Penn is chairing the jury this year and his no longer estranged wife Robin Wright Penn has a film showing here too.


But first – Jen, John, and Norman and Jessica Simpson single again? Poor thing. She cursed herself with that Glamour interview. More on that later.


Gala starts soon. Am posting as much as I can before we have to leave and throughout the night.


Yours in gossip,




PS. Typos galore. Am wrecked from airport limbo and have decided to replace water with champagne. Please excuse atrocious writing.


Smutty Tingles

May 14, 2008 12:06:37 Posted at May 14, 2008 12:06:37
Lainey Posted by Lainey

I’m off to get good and drunk and put this horrendous travel day behind me. Check out my smutty partners to get caught up.

  • Did you know Lily Allen has a HOT body? Everyone’s on the Riviera! (Hollywood Tuna )
  • I call bullsh*t (INO )
  • The Dark Knight cloak and dagger (Holy Moly )


It’s Twins!

May 14, 2008 11:11:16 Posted at May 14, 2008 11:11:16
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Angelina Jolie in Cannes, on a junket for Kung Fu Panda, interviewed today by Access Hollywood confirmed that she is indeed HAVING TWINS! Jack Black apparently f&cked up and blurted it out, then she revealed it herself. The Second AND the THIRD Coming! I feel blessed just being in the same vicinity, breathing the same air of the Chosen One and her sibling deities. Full Story

Is It Her Time?

May 14, 2008 10:57:20 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:57:20
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Hilary Swank has two Oscars. TWO. And Julianne Moore has zero. WTF? Attached – Julianne walking in NYC on Tuesday presumably before heading to Cannes where her film Blindness will open the festival tonight. There is a LOT of hype around this movie. Those who’ve screened it can’t stop talking about it and the buzz is building already, not only for Julianne but also for the screenwriter and co-star Don McKellar … who is Canadian. Full Story

The Bitches and Chuck at the Upfronts

May 14, 2008 10:54:07 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:54:07
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Leighton Meester’s purple clutch…you likey? It’s cool yes. But the fact that she has to tuck her hand into looks weird. At least it photographs weird. Like her hand is missing. Missing a hand looks weird. Other than that, as usual, she is sublime. Love her. And just for Lara – this is Ed Westwick with slick combed hair and a smarmy stank begging me to lick him. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

Bland and Tanned at the Upfronts

May 14, 2008 10:46:24 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:46:24
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Am so over Blake Lively. Here she is at the CW upfronts yesterday wearing a gold dress, showing off a new tan, and, quite frankly, terribly bland. Word is she and boyfriend Penn Badgely were spotted making out on holiday a few days ago in Mexico. Penn showed up with matching bronzed skin. He dropped in at TRL too with Leighton Meester who, of course, has become much more interesting. Full Story

View All 8 Photos

John Takes Jen on the Road

May 14, 2008 10:40:13 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:40:13
Lainey Posted by Lainey

From Miami to Orlando! Jennifer Aniston is taking her sizzling spring fling with John Mayer on the road! John was booked for a private RIM performance in Orlando last night and flew via private jet with Jen and her dog Norman. Norman is so cute. Look at him. Look at his dopey face looking for something to pee on. Full Story

Exit Romo, Enter Tranny?

May 14, 2008 10:37:03 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:37:03
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Her reps are denying it but her reps also lie as often as Jennifer Aniston’s. Robin Leach was the first to report it  two weeks ago. What began as a romantic weekend in Vegas quickly turned sour as Jess and Tony both left town after a huge blowout that supposedly shook the foundations of their fragile love. Full Story

May 14, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

May 14, 2008 10:30:57 Posted at May 14, 2008 10:30:57
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Happy 20th Anniversary Brenda and Don… or BEDS & DONE! Peach bridesmaid dresses? Kenny Rogers? Things change but you two have remained. Congratulations and enjoy the second honeymoon in Great Falls. But seriously…you’re bringing the kids?!?! Love this photo of you deliberating between the Granny and the Tranny. Full Story

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Dear Gossips,

I’m Chuck Bass.


Am losing sleep and paranoid over my PVR – that it won’t work while I’m away to record the season finale of Gossip Girl next Monday and The Office on Thursday. Bit worried about Jim and Pam, actually. How sad is that?

Tuesday – blogging on the fly today. Please forgive typos! Am rushing! Will post at airports between transfers and as soon as we get in. It’s a 20 hour trip door to door but the good news is…

Am headed to Cannes on assignment for eTalk!

Film festival kicks off Wednesday, we’ll be there for the opening gala and will be staying for all the hot parties. And yes, seeing a few movies too. Coverage begins tomorrow on eTalk!

Yours in gossip,