Pineapple Bond

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 1, 2008 06:52:10 August 1, 2008 06:52:10

It’s not often that Daniel Craig shows up on a carpet that’s not his own…but there he was last night, at the LA premiere of Pineapple Express, with his Satsuki by his side, making love to every inch of that suit, in good spirits and causing a frenzy among the fans. F&ck he’s a sexy beast. Full Story

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August 1, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 1, 2008 06:30:17 August 1, 2008 06:30:17

Happy Birthday Joanna and congratulations on the engagement! To Jessica from your sister Janel: Congratulations on getting laid off! It’s not every day that a dream comes true. Enjoy your last day, and with utter cheesiness, carpe diem! To Amalia – Happy 19th Birthday! Best smutty wishes to you as you begin your 4 day bonanza. Full Story

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Britney is better…but not that much better. So the court will likely extend her father’s conservatorship today, even though the vast improvement has been remarkable. Good move. She also apparently has a new man in her life: her bodyguard. Of course. It’s the only man who’s been allowed near her for any extended period of time in a long time. Sigh. Why does there always HAVE to be a man? Why can’t girls like Britney stay single?

And I don’t remember…was Brendan Fraser EVER attractive? Dude has never quivered my loins. And he certainly isn’t quivering ANY loins anymore. But even if he did in the past, doesn’t this severe a fall from grace negate any past hotness, real or imagined?

Brendan was in New York yesterday, making the talk show rounds in support of the Mummy movie, almost alarmingly wired up for every interview. Like he was about to come out the tv and shout at you in your living room. Freak.

Thursday, all day blogging, refresh, refresh, refresh!

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

Katie in the City

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 11:55:00 July 31, 2008 11:55:00

After being trapped at sea on family holiday with the GMD, Katie Holmes has arrived in NYC to throw herself into some serious rehearsal time for her Broadway debut in All My Sons. A supertoned KatE was seen out and about today, clutching a binder, showing off some cut arms, and wearing those ridiculous jeans. Full Story

Deciphering Jessica Simpson

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 11:29:00 July 31, 2008 11:29:00

The effort is there...but so is the cheese. Granted, it’s over the top corny and I’m the bitch who’s dead inside. So most of the time, as soon as I hear the words “cherish” and “heart” in the same sentence, it’s an excuse to head to the casino. Anything is an excuse to head to the casino. Full Story

I’ll have a Franco Pineapple

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 10:33:57 July 31, 2008 10:33:57

January 2007 at Sundance. I interviewed James Franco for eTalk as he was at the festival to promote An American Crime. He looked clammy and tired, like cold cuts gone bad in your refrigerator, and stank of a pack of cigarettes smoked in 10 minutes. Full Story

Hot...but please

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 09:55:03 July 31, 2008 09:55:03

This is Josh Hartnett last night leaving Soho House. Hot, right. But hot enough to be compared to Johnny Depp? Please. That’s blasphemy. Still...yes... Josh is definitely yum. Especially the way he wears his pants. And that hat. Could also totally see him with Kate Hudson for a couple of weeks before she gets bored of his unibrow. Full Story

Smutty Tingles

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 09:50:34 July 31, 2008 09:50:34

Is this Porny’s real waist? (Dlisted )

For the Cowboys, THIS is worse than a lazy offensive line (Hollywood Tuna )

What the f&CK is she doing with Seth MacFarlane? (Drunken Stepfather  site NSFW)

Jailbait won’t share the spotlight (INO )

Bad news for Jude Law’s bank account (Holy Moly )

Is your number bigger than her number? (Cele|bitchy )

MK Catalano (Candy Kirby )

If only we could all wear a skirt like this (IDLYITW )

His girlfriend…or his little sister??? (Pop Sugar )

LC EW

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 09:06:25 July 31, 2008 09:06:25

Three weeks to go and then ...it’s that time again. The Hills Season 4. Am officially over it, but that’s probably a minority sentiment. As momentum builds for the latest round of scripted reality, the esteemed Entertainment Weekly, my favourite magazine, is featuring Lauren Conrad on its new cover. Full Story

Unpaid Bills

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 08:11:00 July 31, 2008 08:11:00

You’d think they’d be liquid, you know? Flush from the funds of so many different projects, across so many different mediums, by so many different sources. But that’s the thing with celebrities. They’re richer than we are, to be sure, but some of them really aren’t THAT rich, especially when you factor in the lifestyle. Full Story

Tweak Before Shopping

Lainey Posted by Lainey at July 31, 2008 07:40:59 July 31, 2008 07:40:59

It’s not that she’s cold. She couldn’t have been cold for 10 years on the set of Friends. It’s that she loves the attention. She lives for the attention. She is turned on by the attention. It’s the only stimulus that gets her going. Which explains the tit for tat with the Pitts. Full Story