How I Met Your Chicken Fried Mother

March 18, 2008 08:28:49 Posted at March 18, 2008 08:28:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Been a while since there was actually something not sad to say about Chicken Fried Stupid. But since Daddy’s come ‘round, Britney Spears has been forced into a state of less craziness and the improvement has been gradual but remarkable. She’s even working again and I’m sure you know, she’ll be guest starring on How I Met Your Mother on an episode that will air next week. Full Story

At Work Without Reese

March 18, 2008 07:51:11 Posted at March 18, 2008 07:51:11
Lainey Posted by Lainey

It’s not the same, is it? Promoting a movie without the perfect wife, selling tickets on the strength of your carb face douchebaggery alone, hoping that the 17 year olds who pined for you 10 years ago will still find you attractive today… This is Ryan Phillippe’s new reality. Was refreshing though to see him in something other than a sweaty beater and sports shorts last night at the premiere of Stop Loss. Full Story

Will on Xenu

March 18, 2008 07:24:00 Posted at March 18, 2008 07:24:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Addressing rumours that he’s now one with The Church, Will Smith told the NY Daily News: "I am a Christian. I am a student of all religions. And I respect all people and all paths. Full Story

My Gwyneth: there for Madonna

March 18, 2008 07:16:50 Posted at March 18, 2008 07:16:50
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Madge and my Gwynnie hooked up last night in London for dinner at Locanda Locatelli amid rumours that, despite assurances to the contrary, she and Guy are, for all intents and purposes, totally over. At issue, apparently, is that Madonna found out  Full Story

Granny Freeze: Photoshoot at the Beach

March 18, 2008 06:47:00 Posted at March 18, 2008 06:47:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

So Granny’s bodyguard beat the sh*t out of a photographer last week and not a word of it in any of the papers or the weeklies. Coincidence or conspiracy? Consider this: Nicole Kidman is super tight with Rupert Murdoch. Full Story

March 18, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

March 18, 2008 06:44:25 Posted at March 18, 2008 06:44:25
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Happy 32nd Birthday to Shannon F in Saskatoon! To Haley – congratulations on Waterloo! This will pass. I’ve seen your photo, read about your accomplishments… this WILL pass. Love the Mother/Daughter Smut Brigade! For Mark – thrilled to hear you’re better. And if anyone is having Tom Ford’s babies, it’s me bitch! Full Story

Monday, March 17, 2008

Dear Gossips,

March Madness… can you taste it? And did you taste Mimi’s cheese on SNL? Seriously… Mimi’s cheese was stronger and more pungent than ever. My husband and I kept trying to look up her skirt which was, maybe, just maybe, 7 inches long.

Click here to touch her body. Click here to watch her show off her funny cheese with Jonah Hill and Bill Hader. And attached – Mariah in full cheese posing for the paps at the afterparty. Mimi Cheese makes my life.

Monday – online all day, check back often.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Heads up Calgary – gossip party during Juno lead-up is coming together!!! Details to come later this week… but first the date. The date is Thursday, April 3rd. You comin’???

PPS. Isla Fisher is not blowing and dashing. The singing bitch with complaints is not Celine Dion. Jean-Claude Van Damme is not gay and broke but he totally could be, though at the very least his aggressive hustling has apparently been dialed down.

Her Madgesty’s “Joyful” Marriage

March 17, 2008 14:59:05 Posted at March 17, 2008 14:59:05
Lainey Posted by Lainey

After weeks of UNtogetherness, even on a few very meaningful, important occasions, Madonna’s long serving publicist Liz Rosenberg has just released the following statement: "I am delighted to confirm that Mr. Full Story

The Perils of a Pimp Mom

March 17, 2008 13:39:00 Posted at March 17, 2008 13:39:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

This is what happens when your mother is more interested in pimping you than she is in raising you. Not only do you become a drug addict, so used and loose at only 21 that even the p*ssy posse wants nothing to do with you wants nothing to do with you Full Story

Me on Becks

March 17, 2008 12:42:28 Posted at March 17, 2008 12:42:28
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sorta. Becks has a new tattoo. In Chinese. I can speak it, but the only thing I can read and write are names of movie stars. As such, according to Page Six: “The tattoo is written in traditional Mandarin Chinese and is an old Chinese proverb that says: "Death and life have determined appointments, Riches and honors depends upon heaven. Full Story

Colin and Lily Cole?

March 17, 2008 12:23:00 Posted at March 17, 2008 12:23:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

They’re both shooting The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus and my sources say they’ve hooked up on a few occasions… no working involved. First, at the Vancouver Aquarium – kinda cute for a first date. Except that he had an entourage accompanying him. And then seen last week, late at night, heading into her hotel room. Full Story