Welcome Back Nelly

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 08:38:31 April 15, 2008 08:38:31

It has been too long. Too long since Nelly put out a video. Too long since Nelly frolicked in the shower with a dance floor ho. Too long since Nelly dragged on a joint on a baseball diamond with strippers in go-go boots. I love Nelly. And Nelly is finally back! Here’s Nelly at TRL yesterday promoting his new video with Fergie Ferg. Full Story

Anna Loves Gwyneth

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 08:22:10 April 15, 2008 08:22:10

It’s unanimous. Gwyneth’s new cover for the May issue of Vogue, as my husband would say, licks balls. Not even I, a Gwyneth worshipper through and through, can find an ounce of golden goodness in this goose. It’s horrid. But it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that you hate it. Full Story

Go ‘head and flaunt it

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 07:57:09 April 15, 2008 07:57:09

Who wouldn’t? Fergie and Josh Duhamel went out for dinner last night in NYC and as she was leaving, Fergie proudly displayed that engagement ring. Lucky bitch. She also showed off a remarkably attractive face. Call me Cruise but …has she been getting better and better looking the last year or so? Or is it like numbing to an eyesore? Can’t decide but either way, Fergie is clearly no longer a Donatella Versace. Full Story

Mommy Daddy Date Night

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 07:41:36 April 15, 2008 07:41:36

JLo JLo JLo stepped out with Marc Anthony for dinner at the Waverly with a fresh blowout in white studded Louboutin mary janes ready to amaze the world with her rapid post-twins weight loss. She does look incredible, non? Full of life and glow, maybe a little tired around the eyes, but very, very real. Full Story

Granny Grows… a Little. I think?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 07:28:00 April 15, 2008 07:28:00

Last night at the CMT Awards, Granny Freeze Nicole Kidman looked beautiful. Seriously beautiful. Like a statue or an artifact polished and presented, like any inanimate work of art, stunningly beautiful without the blush of life. Here’s Gran with Keith basking in her expectant glow, slightly, I think, bigger in the belly than the last time we saw her, and clearly freshly returned from a Botox, Restalyne, Collagen touch-up. Full Story

April 15, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 15, 2008 07:05:02 April 15, 2008 07:05:02

For Colleen and her girls who won this Alice + Olivia polka dot clutch that I promised to give away on the Juno red carpet. Thanks for coming out… LOVE the new look! For Kristi K who is getting married this Saturday – congratulations from the Stikeman girls! And for the Stikeman girls from me… thanks for sticking with my smut from the beginning! Thanks to Amber from Forzani for the hook up! Hopefully next time we’ll be able to meet in person. Full Story

Monday, April 14, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Moving is the worst. Moving on a travel weekend is absolute torture. Am on assignment for eTalk.ctv.ca until Wednesday – first Portland, then LA. Two pretty amazing interviews. Hint: Have you read Twilight? More on that later.

So Chicken Fried might be getting better…but Chicken Fried still can’t drive. Britney’s three car fender bender this weekend was the result, supposedly, of her doing her makeup before coming to a full stop. Thing is, I’d be a hypocrite if I slagged her for it. Because I can’t say I’ve never checked my blackberry behind the wheel. Will promise to stop, starting now. After all, I’m also Chinese. Terrible driving combination. By the way – you think she’s in love with her bodyguard? He has her type written all over him. They’ll probably be married by summer.

Monday – am blogging on the fly. Check back often… and I need your help! See below, am not too proud to beg.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Sarah Jessica Parker is not cranky. Also not Hilary Swank. No awards for this anorexic.

Photos from Wenn.com

No Rhythm > Over-Rhythm

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 14:11:00 April 14, 2008 14:11:00

Am not evolved enough to understand the apparent loin-inflammation that has been resulting from Mario Lopez’s Broadway debut in A Chorus Line. So he can dance. But does he have to flame dance? This is ignorant, I know. And I wish I could be like Sarah Jessica Parker. I wish I could see a dandy up on stage and go ahead and marry it. Full Story

Bond’s Blue Eyes

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 11:34:00 April 14, 2008 11:34:00

This is for my producer Laura who sends me on the best assignments. Thank you for Twilight. Now here’s a little Bond. Daniel Craig and fiancée (or perhaps wife) on Sunday at the London premiere of Flashbacks of a Fool. These photos have not been enhanced. Those really are his eyes. The true colour of his eyes. Full Story

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When She’s With Ken

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 10:55:00 April 14, 2008 10:55:00

What is it about Ken Paves that he brings out Jessica’s tranny time and again? It’s not as bad as it’s been in the past but the signs are all there – the linebacker shoulders, those hermy-lookin’ legs, and also an air of tacky even with a trillion dollar bag and matching shoes. Full Story

Cougar Cam Makes a Cameo

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 14, 2008 08:53:52 April 14, 2008 08:53:52

The first sketch on SNL is always considered the strongest. And while Ashton Kutcher was officially the host, it was Cameron’s cameo that stole the show. She was fantastic. Obnoxious and annoying and perfect – in many ways, Saturday Night Live is the ideal showcase for her… talents. Full Story