Jakey vs Shelfy?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 17, 2008 06:28:00 April 17, 2008 06:28:00

Shelf Ass Jessica Biel somehow conned her way into a starring role opposite Jake Gyllenhaal in Nailed, the first screenplay co-penned by Kristin Gore. No wonder she’s so happily smug…although my sources say, she needs to be careful. Jakey, you see, is not a fan of her antics. Specifically her paparazzi antics. Full Story

High Profile Itch

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 17, 2008 06:15:35 April 17, 2008 06:15:35

London is buzzing. Gossips have been circulating the story for weeks but now a certain high profile former tabloid journalist/reality personality is yapping away about a scandal that’s on the verge of breaking concerning David Beckham’s tryst with a famous actress. Needless to say, Victoria doesn’t know. Full Story

The Girls Without KatE

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 17, 2008 06:11:10 April 17, 2008 06:11:10

Adding fuel to the speculation that Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes have broken up – last night Posh hit the town for an early birthday celebration and KatE was conspicuously absent. She’s been replaced though by another Kate – Beckinsale, that is, and Eva Longoria, who was interviewed recently about her friendship with Victoria and she explained that they were all about hanging out at each other’s houses and “eating”. Full Story

April 17, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 17, 2008 06:08:45 April 17, 2008 06:08:45

Happy Birthday Susan N! When are you bringing me in again? I’m sure there are at least a couple of riddle answers you need? Hope all is well, sending you warm wishes for a great day. Happy Birthday Sandra aka Sam – 54, 22, 32, two 18s, a 5, and a 13…you’re right. It’s all the same! Happy Birthday Ray from Amanda – love how you spend your workdays debating guesses. Full Story

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Spent several hours yesterday at the Crue Fest press conference and interviewing Motley Crue. Craziest assignment ever. More on that later. But let me assure you first that, despite being warned by three separate non-metal fan journalists that Tommy Lee would charm his way into my heart, and perhaps my pants, it absolutely didn’t happen.

My loins did, however, discover Josh Todd, lead singer of Buckcherry. Major headbanging quiveration.

Wednesday – am headed home, blogging on the fly. Check back often.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. Chris Martin did not abandon Gwyneth, Apple, and Moses for some online skank.

Just Missed Posh

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 09:19:52 April 16, 2008 09:19:52

Heather and I went looking for suspenders on Robertson yesterday and when we popped into Kitson in desperation, we were shocked – SHOCKED! – that it actually wasn’t a dump in there. If you’ve been to Kitson, you know what I mean. They stock their sh*t haphazardly in these random bins, hundred dollar bangles crash around in tin containers, thousand dollar dresses are smashed in a corner, jammed in with knickknacks and tee shirts. Full Story

Becks likes bigger bums

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 09:05:00 April 16, 2008 09:05:00

Maybe he would like mine! Mine is bigger than his wife’s! All asses are bigger than his wife’s! Just like the ass he appeared to be appreciating courtside at the Laker game the other day. Hee. Funny, yes. But also sad. That Victoria tortures herself down to a size triple 0, painfully insecure, to hang on tightly to her man and her image, when all he really wants is to grab onto some junk from behind. Full Story

What Happened to the First & Second?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 08:47:00 April 16, 2008 08:47:00

Nicole Kidman was rather chatty the other night on the carpet at the CMT Awards – unusual for her when it’s not really HER project. It was Keith Urban of course who was a nominee that night. And you know Granny Freeze prefers to play demure where the marriage is concerned – on the outside, that is. Full Story

Rossum Thinnification

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 08:37:00 April 16, 2008 08:37:00

It’s been a long, long time since Emmy brought her Rossum to a red carpet. Late last year you had to scrape her off the red carpet. Because Rossum showed up at every red carpet to rape us with her sugar…thank you Keira Knightley. Full Story

But will it sell?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 06:07:00 April 16, 2008 06:07:00

People.com is reporting it now so it must be true, right? Or they must want us to believe it’s true right? Because according to the celebrity ass-kissing magazine, Ashlee Simpson is indeed pregnant and she and Pete Wentz will wed in May. Full Story

The Twilight Set Visit

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 16, 2008 06:03:00 April 16, 2008 06:03:00

I wrote about the Stephenie Meyers series last year, click here for a refresher. Have since recommended to many of my friends with the following warning: the writing is… grating. You might hate yourself while reading it. Full Story