But for the GMD…

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 06:04:00 March 31, 2008 06:04:00

Will Smith is every kind of perfect. But for the GMD. And it’s not the maybe gaybe, but the fraud of the maybe gaybe. The fraud of the maybe gaybe and the friendship with the little fraud. Because if Will Smith was a definitely gaybe, and openly definitely gaybe, Will Smith would be eve more perfect. Full Story

How Much Effort…

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 06:02:00 March 31, 2008 06:02:00

Do you think it takes the Alba Bitch to smile? And to hide her crusty ass from the children? Under these circumstances, at the Kids’ Choice Awards, she must be grinding her teeth to the point of a migraine. Bet your boob job Cash Warren received a tongue lashing that night. For overflow. Like using a breast bump. Full Story

A Veteran at 18

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 05:58:15 March 31, 2008 05:58:15

She might be headed for rough waters, but right now Miley Cyrus can still totally pass for teen. Hayden Panettiere on the other hand hasn’t looked like a teen in two years. Which is totally cool for a 30 year old…only Hayden isn’t a 30 year old but an 18 year old. And take it from someone who saw 30 four years ago – looking young never gets old. Full Story

View All 10 Photos

History Repeats Itself

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 05:52:00 March 31, 2008 05:52:00

Once upon a time, not too long ago, a longhaired pretty teen became the toast of the town, with a hit movie, a recording contract, and a too blonde, too orange mother-manager overseeing her career. Pretty soon she was living at the Chateau Marmont, dating boys much much older, had developed an eating disorder, and in the year 2007 alone, was the proud graduate of not one, not two, but three substance abuse treatment programs. Full Story

View All 8 Photos

March 31, 2008 – Smutty Shout-Outs

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 31, 2008 05:47:36 March 31, 2008 05:47:36

Congratulations Christina on the promotion! Full Time Regular sounds amazing. Congratulations to Kelly D on the birth of her third – Tate Michael – last week. Rich says you were a total “rock star” the entire time. Of course you were! Happy 30-something birthday to Rione, the Queen of blind items, from your friends Anne and Kaili who are much impressed by your persistence and online sleuthing skills. Full Story

Friday, March 28, 2008

Dear Gossips,

A meeting with the head of Disney earlier this week and a very public lunch
with Sumner Redstone yesterday at the Polo Lounge – what does the GMD have up his sleeve?

As you probably recall, Redstone, who chairs Viacom which payrolls Paramount, dumped Tom unceremoniously after he brought the crazy out 3 years ago. Clearly they’ve buried the hatchet and, most importantly, want everyone else to know it.

Never count out the GMD. He’s as resilient as Hollywood Ebola Paris Hilton.

Finally it’s Friday. Am online all day, check back often!

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. He is not holding Marion Cotillard. Or Eva Mendes. And not Heidi Montag who will never need to be the subject of a riddle. Why bother?

Sweet Valley Smaller

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 28, 2008 10:01:54 March 28, 2008 10:01:54

You remember Jessica and Elizabeth Wakefield, don’t you? Francine Pascal’s Sweet Valley High is being reissued by Random House to capitalise on the current generation of Gossip Girl/The Hills obsessed tweens…with one small, teeny tiny difference: in the original series, the twins were “perfect size 6’s”. Full Story

Please. Shut. Your. Ass.

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 28, 2008 09:40:00 March 28, 2008 09:40:00

Well… at the very least, it’s an admission that he really does google himself. Obsessively. John Mayer – again taking to his blog with a long winded manifesto about… Fame? Vanity?Narcissism? Aspiring to more? Finding meaning in life? Sure. Full Story

Ebola’s Safe Spot

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 28, 2008 08:40:54 March 28, 2008 08:40:54

Am sure you’ve all seen it – this clip of a rhythmically impaired Hollywood Ebola Paris Hilton trying to belly dance on Turkish television – as is the case whenever she attempts to groove, Paris is found to be seriously lacking. Full Story

Make Another Movie

Lainey Posted by Lainey at March 28, 2008 08:13:50 March 28, 2008 08:13:50

After a couple weeks of bliss with Owen Wilson in Miami, Kate Hudson is back to work in New York shooting Bride Wars with Anne Hathaway. Something about best friends settling on the same wedding date, quickly becoming adversaries, ripping each other to pieces in the process. Lame. F*cking. Sh&t. Full Story