Honeymoon Over

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 29, 2008 07:57:28 January 29, 2008 07:57:28

Drew Barrymore and Justin Long at the premiere of Vince Vaughn’s Wild West Comedy Show last night in Hollywood making their first official red carpet appearance as a couple and taking the occasion way over the top. Which means the honeymoon is over. Which means they have entered the exposure and exploitation phase of their love. Full Story

Chicken Fried Intervention

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 29, 2008 07:19:11 January 29, 2008 07:19:11

Another epic night – can hardly keep track. In short, Britney and Sam Lutfi had a huge scrap last night in front of the paps. She stormed off, ran off with a couple of photographers, called Adnan, hooked up with him for a while, then came home, had a standoff with her parents, then went out again, returned home for an intervention… and capped off the night – at 1:30am – by driving out to the drug store with her mom Lynne and that creepy Sam. Full Story

Just As She Is

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 29, 2008 07:00:14 January 29, 2008 07:00:14

I will always love that part in Bridget Jones’s Diary – when Mark Darcy tells her at the bottom of the stairs that she’s a mess but still he likes her “very much… just as you are.” And that little song is playing in the background, cut to Jude and Shazzer contemplating the profundity of his words… Sigh. Full Story

Monday, January 28, 2008

Dear Gossips,

Finally a red carpet!

SAG Awards went down last night and as usual, the media masters, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, fresh off Angie’s Oscar snub, knew exactly what they were doing. At the centre of a pregnancy mystery, Mama Pitt put on a dress that stole the spotlight. Not because it was particularly revealing… but because it wasn’t. With her breasts pushed forward, and her belly too, deliberately drawing attention to her stomach, and her body draped in a muumuu, Angie gave hope to Brangelunatics everywhere that this is the year of the Second (and perhaps the Third) Coming. And she sent word to the Academy that their carpet will be much less intriguing without the Pitts porn-to-pregnant presence.

Have the Pitts actually produced an 8/8/8 baby??? Even better… bet your Botox Granny Freeze is growing even more grey at seeing her own fertility spotlight getting usurped by the two biggest names in gossip. Because if it really is the Second and the Third Coming, Granny Nicole’s delivery will be but a footnote on the day. Hee.

Full SAG fashion wrap-up and weekend update below – so many posts today it may take more than the home page. Scroll down and click on “view more articles” to get fully caught up.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

PS. To Tammy from your girls who miss you and love you and support you – he will get his. And there is MUCH better for you on the horizon. Trust.

UPDATE: Am blogging all day! Check back often!

Rossum For Money: Junior Murders Poetry

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 13:50:40 January 28, 2008 13:50:40

I really should save this for a Friday, to send you roaring with laughter into the weekend. But it’s too good. It’s too f&cking good. And it’s so f&cking Rossum you will lose your sh*t. Promise. So in the February issue of Self Magazine, Tori Spelling is featured in the “My TrueSelf” section, something about how and where she finds inspiration, complete with photos of her dogs, an obligatory pimp of her new jewellery line, and of course… The Junior. Full Story

The Pitts" Parental Accessories

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 13:02:15 January 28, 2008 13:02:15

Angelina and Brad - their accessories last night at the SAGs. On her a gold cuff, a gift from her lover, and here’s the best part: The design on the cuff is a drawing by their son Maddox. Brad evidently had it engraved on to the bracelet. Now tell me that’s not a shot straight to your private place. Full Story

Chicken Fried Blender

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 12:24:47 January 28, 2008 12:24:47

This cover makes my life. The Mickey Mouse ashtray, the Red Bull, the reference to her underwear, and a clarification from the editors that reads:This cover image is a composite photo. Britney did not pose for the picture. That, sadly, is not her body. Snort. It’s the “sadly” that sends me over the edge. Full Story

Shelfy Summons… Pippy Comes Runnin’!

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 11:44:16 January 28, 2008 11:44:16

Shocker! While Jessica Biel and her Shelf Ass have been in England massacring a movie with her bad accent, her Pipsqueak beau has been left to his own devices and seen partying solo and fighting temptation in LA. Rumours surfaced today from New York that he was spotted at Tenjune making out with a sizzling brunette. Full Story

Worst Dressed: Sara Ramirez

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 00:00:00 January 28, 2008 00:00:00

You know I love her. You know I adore Callie. But what I said earlier about Nikki Blonsky applies to Sara Ramirez…she needs a hook up with America Ferrera’s stylist. Or Jennifer Hudson. Because curves are great. And curves need to be showcased more effectively. Curves need to be given their due. Full Story

Best Dressed: Marion Cotillard

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 00:00:00 January 28, 2008 00:00:00

She won’t win the Oscar but she will win Best Dressed. Because my Marion’s dress last night was the standard. Love the no frills accessorising. And the close-scalp hair. And the makeup. And she is apparently even more spectacular in person, as every photographer and publicist I spoke to could not stop marvelling at how much more “beautiful she is when she moves”. Full Story

Best Dressed: Viggo Mortensen

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 28, 2008 10:44:32 January 28, 2008 10:44:32

Don’t know what the hell that is dangling below his knee. Don’t care what it is either. Somehow it works. He’s weird enough to make it work. And he’s hot enough to quiver your loins even though he looks like psycho Gepetto. Seriously, I imagine Viggo Mortensen as the kind of dude with super pungent sweat… only you really wouldn’t mind in bed. Full Story